Quotes from Richard Hunt movies and TV shows

Statler: You know I never liked this show's theme music.
Waldorf: Niether did I.
Kermit: You promised.

Waldorf: Well, you gotta give them credit.
Statler: Why's that?
Waldorf: Well, they're gonna keep on doing it till they get it right.

Waldorf: These seats are awful.
Statler: Why? Can't you see anything?
Waldorf: That's the problem. I can see everything.

Statler: Please don't make me watch it.

Statler: Now why did you do that to poor Fozzie?
Waldorf: Do what? I really was on the Titanic.
Statler: I know. You still have the dress you wore so they'd let you in the life boat. Heh heh heh.
Waldorf: D'oh.

Waldorf: Pay up! They made it through another one.
Statler: Double or nothing next week's show?
Waldorf: You're on.

Statler: What have you got for an opening act this time? A Chinese gorilla dancing ballet?
Kermit: Cancel the opening number.
Chinese Gorilla: Dong day do dai dai do.

Waldorf: Yeah, the show is good for what ails me.
Statler: Yeah? What does ail you?
Waldorf: Insomnia.

Waldorf: I can't believe those rats were responsible for this show.
Statler: Those rats were also responsible for the bubonic plague. Dohohohoh.

Statler: I like that last number.
Waldorf: What did you like about it?
Statler: It was the last number.

Statler: Ever heard of pig on bikes?
Waldorf: I've never heard of road hogs.

Waldorf: Just when you think this show is terrible something wonderful happens.
Statler: What?
Waldorf: It ends.

Fozzie: I don't got rhythm.
Rowlf: That's for sure.
Fozzie: I don't got rhythm.
Rowlf: Who can ask for anything more?
Statler: We could.
Waldorf: Yeah! Earplugs.

Statler: This show is awful.
Waldorf: Terrible.
Statler: Disgusting.
Waldorf: See you next week?
Statler: Of course.