Quotes from Elijah Wood movies and TV shows

Huck Finn: You're the best friend I ever had, Jim.
Jim: You're the only friend I ever had.

Huck Finn: I'm sorry Jim... I didn't want this to happen.
Jim: You're still my best and only friend.

Norval Greenwood: Semen contains more protein and nutrients than an ear.

Norval Greenwood: I'm not a murderer.
Brian: You just killed somebody literally five minutes ago.

Norval Greenwood: I'm not someone you can pigeonhole, if I'm completely honest. Do I produce blazing beats? Yes. Do I tinkle the ivories? Yes. Do I promote high-profile events pertaining to music and the performance of music? Yes.

Gordon: Just so you know, if you want to impress me, I like fight stories. Ever been in a fight?
Norval Greenwood: No.
Gordon: I have. I once accidentally kicked a guy's ear off. I didn't mean to, but the fucker flew off. I could see right into his skull. Good night.

Clementine: HEY! Lets go out dancing! You want to go out to Montauk with me?
Patrick: Montauk?
Clementine: Yeah, no! Come out to Boston with me.
Patrick: Sure, we can go next weekend.
Clementine: No! Now! Now! I have to go see the frozen Charles noW.

Patrick: Mary hates me. I've never been popular with the ladies.
Stan: Maybe if you stopped stealing their panties.

Nat Cooper: You're lying.
Felix: I am not lying. My dentist said he's never seen so many cavities in one mouth and that he's sending a sample of my saliva to the University of Wisconsin.

Matt Buckner: What are you talkin' about, baseball is a girl's game? The Red Sox has a guy that pitches the ball over 90 miles per hour.
Pete Dunham: Who cares? All that means is that he can have a wank faster than you.

Matt Buckner: I've never lived closer to danger, but I've never felt safer. I've never felt more confident, and people could spot it from a mile away. And as for this, the violence? I gotta be honest - it grew on me. Once you've taken a few punches and realise you're not made of glass, you don't feel alive unless you're pushing yourself as far as you can go.

Matt Buckner: You know the best part? It isn't knowing that your friends have your back. It's knowing that you have your friends' back.

Matt Buckner: Pete Dunham's life taught me there's a time to stand your ground, and his death taught me there's a time to walk away.

Matt Buckner: Was that a terrorist attack? What happened here?
Shannon Dunham: Welcome to match-day madness. Tottenham was in town last night.

Pete Dunham: Fuck it, I will take you with me. You might learn something.
Matt Buckner: About soccer?
Pete Dunham: No mate. Not about soccer, and FOR fuck sake, stop saying soccer.

Ramon: You just got to do exactly what I say!
Mumble: Okay.
Ramon: Did I say "okay"?
Mumble: No.
Ramon: No. What did I say?
Mumble: Do exactly what you say.
Ramon: EXACTLY what I say!

Ramon: You know, chica chica boom boom boom boom boom.
Mumble: You are not interested in chicas?
Raul: You kidding?
Ramon: Without us, the chicas got no boom!

[Another Hobbit drunkenly hits on Rosie, Sam's crush.]
Frodo: Don't worry, Sam. Rosie knows an idiot when she sees one.
Sam: [Worried.] Does she?

Frodo: It's a pity Bilbo didn't kill him when he had the chance.
Gandalf: Pity? It was pity that stayed Bilbo's hand. Many that live deserve death. Some that die deserve life. Can you give it to them, Frodo? Do not be too eager to deal out death in judgment. Even the very wise cannot see all ends. My heart tells me that Gollum has some part to play yet, for good or ill before this is over. The pity of Bilbo may rule the fate of many.

Aragorn: Are you frightened?
Frodo: Yes.
Aragorn: Not nearly frightened enough. I know what hunts you.