Keeping the Faith
Movie Quote Quiz

Rabbi Jacob "Jake" Schram: Jews want their rabbis to be the kind of Jews they don't have the time to be.
Father Brian Kilkenney Finn: Yeah, and Catholics want their priests to be the kind of Catholics they don't have the discipline to be.

Anna Riley: I haven't screamed that hard since the US hockey team beat the Russians.

Father Brian Kilkenney Finn: The seven deadly sins. Who can name the seven deadly sins? People! It was a very popular film with Brad Pitt, you have the ultimate cliff note.

Jacob: God was showing off when he made you.

Father Havel: Who is calling at this hour? It's barbaric. I was dreaming about my mother's sausages.

Father Brian Kilkenney Finn: You're a Sikh, Catholic Muslim with Jewish in-laws?
Indian Bartender: Yes. Yes. It gets very complicated. I'm reading Dianetics.
Father Brian Kilkenney Finn: Don't blame you.

Anna Riley: You don't understand. I have a relationship with my phone, we have a chemistry together, I can't explain it.

Anna Riley: I work harder than God. If He had hired me, He would have made the world by Thursday.

Anna Riley: I read your sarin gas report. It was very powerful.
Rachel Rose: Thanks, I really earned my stripes with that piece.
Rabbi Jacob "Jake" Schram: I earned my stripes by getting through a bris without fainting.

Indian Bartender: May those who love us, love us. And those who don't love us - may God turn their hearts. And if He cannot turn their hearts, may he turn their ankles, so that we may know them by their limping.

Anna Riley: So this is a rectory. That sounds like a dirty word. Rectory.

Father Brian Kilkenney Finn: Whoah! Are you seriously telling me that unless you find a nice Jewish girl and settle down in the next six months they're not going to give you this job?
Rabbi Jacob "Jake" Schram: I'm seriously telling you there has not been a bachelor head rabbi of B'Nei Ezra since the beginning of the synagogue.

Father Brian Kilkenney Finn: If I was to tell you that I loved you and I'd give it all away just to be with you, what would you say?
Woman in Bar: Good night, Paulie.
Father Brian Kilkenney Finn: Yep. That's about par for the evening.

Indian Bartender: Um, let me get this straight. I am talking to a pries who went on a bender because his best friend, a rabbi, stole his girl.
Father Brian Kilkenney Finn: Right.
Indian Bartender: Thank you. I want to thank you for telling me this story.
Father Brian Kilkenney Finn: Why?
Indian Bartender: Because now I can retire.

Rabbi Jacob "Jake" Schram: Let me just say... Oy.
Father Brian Kilkenney Finn: Amen to your oy.

Father Brian Kilkenney Finn: I don't doubt myself because of you. I feel like the best version of myself when I'm with you, and that makes me doubt everything else.

Rabbi Jacob "Jake" Schram: Whoa! Listen to what you're saying. You're telling me that I was supposed to be sensitive to the possibility that a Catholic priest might have a crush on my secret girlfriend?

Anna Riley: Jake Schram.
Rabbi Jacob "Jake" Schram: Yes.
Anna Riley: How are you? Who are you? Tell me everything, give me the 4-1-1, I wanna know. Girls, job, news.

Continuity mistake: The 3 main characters are having dinner with Anne Bancroft. You can see Jenna Elfman's dark roots. After she and Ben Stiller go home the roots are light. Did she stop to get her hair touched-up on the way home?

More mistakes in Keeping the Faith

Trivia: When Milos Forman, who plays Father Havel, talks to Edward Norton about faith in the private quarters of the church he tells Norton that he came to America when the Russians invaded Czechoslovakia. He actually did so in real life.

More trivia for Keeping the FaithMore movie quotes

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