Hardware: Another panty raid, Trip?
Tripper: Important announcement - Some hunters have been seen in the woods near Piney Ridge trail and the fish and game commission has raised the legal kill limit on campers to three. So, if you're hiking today, please wear something bright and keep low.
Tripper: You must be the short depressed kid we ordered.
Tripper: But, the real excitement of course is going to come at the end of the summer, during Sexual Awareness week. We import two hundred hookers from around the world, and each camper, armed with only a thermos of coffee and two thousand dollars cash, tries to visit as many countries as he can. The winner of course is named King of Sexual Awareness week and is allowed to rape and pillage the neighboring towns until camp ends.
The Stomach: What? No mustard?
Wendy: Tripper, I'm looking forward to some action this summer. I hope you can supply it.
Tripper: I'll supply it for you, but the guy you gotta watch out for is Spaz.
Wendy: Spaz?
Tripper: He's a sex machine.
Wendy: He couldn't wake me up with a trumpet and a drum.
Tripper: Well I went out with him one night and he got off six nurses by himself, and four of them couldn't report to work the next morning.
Rudy: I'm going away.
Tripper: You goin' to Vegas? If you're going to Vegas, I would be up for it because I love that town. I'm a party guy. I love that town.
Rudy: I don't think they want me around.
Tripper: You talkin' about the soccer heads back there? Well, that's life in the fast-paced slam-bang, live-on-the-razor's-edge, laugh-in-the-face-of-death world of junior league soccer.
Tripper: What's the matter? You're pacing like an expectant father with the clap.
Cheerleaders: Death, injury, blood and brains.
