Jessica: Or-Or smart, but funny in a totally unappealing way. You know? Just like funny/stupid, or funny/dopey, but not funny/witty or funny/ironic or funny/goofy, you know? Or-Or they seem smart, and then you realize that they aren't at all. And that's funny, but funny/tragic.
Dan Stein: You know, I've been hearing about "the one" for I don't know, like 20 years. I guess I thought it would be a guy.
Jessica: I know, I know, but look, I don't even believe that any more. I don't believe there's just one person. I think there are, like, seven.
Helen: Who do you have to blow to get some fucking pussy around here!
Helen: What does your therapist say about all of this?
Jessica: Oh, I could never tell my therapist.
Helen: Why not?
Jessica: Because it's private.
Jessica: Oh, I'm a terrible insomniac.
Helen: I'm so sorry. Since when?
Jessica: Um, I don't know, since birth.
Helen: Some people smoke pot, some people bungee jump, some people chant. What do you do to be happy?
Jessica: Nothing. I'm not.
