Dr. Wynn: Now, for God's sake, he can't even drive a car.
Loomis: He was doing very well last night! Maybe someone around here gave him lessons.
Rachel: A fucking 'Facebook' killer... You're kidding me right?
Chloe: I guess now it would be Twitter, that'd make more sense.
Bill: He thr-thr-thr-thrusts his fi-fi-fists ag-ag-against the pos-posts and...
Ben: He thrusts his fists against the posts and still insists he sees the ghosts. That's all it says over and over.
Bill: Th-th-thats w-w-what m-m-my m-m-mom g-gave me t-to h-help with my st-st-stutter.
Richie: I hate to tell you buddy, it ain't working.
Mort: I don't care. I'm just gonna smoke. I'm just gonna totally smoke. I'll finish these, go to the store and get a brand-new pack, smoke the shit out of that one.
Seth: I may be an asshole, but I'm not a fucking asshole.
Bernadette 'Bernie' Walsh: This is sick, Helen! This isn't one of your fairytales, a woman got killed here.
Scott 'Scotty' Braddock: I'm serious... You want to play cock of the walk, bro?
Deaundre 'Double D' Davis: Why do I think you want to call me something else? You want to call me something else, Scotty? 'Cause I don't think you get it. I can see you thinking it, whether you say it or not.
Irene: I'm not a whore!
Frank the Trucker: [tossing her a $20 bill.] You are now!
Jonathan Harker: You make it very difficult for me. After all, I'm a guest here. If I'm to help you, I must have a reason.
Vampire Woman: A reason! You ask for a reason? Is it not reason enough that he locks me up in this house, holds me against my will? You can have no idea what an evil man he is... or of the terrible things he does.
Lindsay Lohan: I'm gonna blow you across the room.
Charlie Sheen: Sounds awesome.
Pete: Bingo... Did you say bingo like the game in church basements?
Beaver: Well there's trim there.
Pete: Oh, Beaver.
Mike Anderson: Pushers get pushed. It's a sad fact of life, but that's how it is. Pushers get pushed.
Papillon: It wasn't my fault.
Elvira: I'd bend over backwards. I'd bend over forwards.
Howard Howe: Your life as you knew it is over, Mr. Bryton. So if you wish to continue living, you will be a walrus, or you'll be nothing at all.
Lucas Ward: I always find a book that much more compelling when the character stands to lose everything.
Dracula: You shall pay, black prince. I shall place a curse of suffering on you that will doom you to a living hell. I curse you with my name. You shall be... Blacula.