Quotes from Pauly Shore movies and TV shows

Crawl: Let's just get the rules straight here. There'll be absolutely no partying in this hall between the hours of 5 and 6 in the morning, without my express written permission. OK cool. Carry on.

Crawl: Chickens You guys have chickens? I love chickens! Are they extra crispy or original recipe?

Crawl: Where are you from?
Becca: South Dakota.
Crawl: Fresh off the farm, oh my God, I can't believe it. Right across the hallway. Hallelujah. So you're inbred?
Becca: What?
Crawl: You know, where your mom's your dad, and your dad's your brother.

Crawl: Hey, you'll be happy to know that as soon as you left, I popped your daughter's trunk.
Walter: Oh, shit.

Crawl: My name's Crawl and I'm the RA. And you are? No wait, don't tell me. Sally? Jessie? Raphael?

Zack: Maybe now's a good time to talk about the rules in my room.
Crawl: Rules?
Zack: Rule number 1: Don't touch anything.
Crawl: And what's rule number 2?
Zack: There's only one rule. Don't touch anything.

Crawl: Going into European Studies, buddy.
Crawl: I mean, cruising around Europe, backpacking, right?
Crawl: Munchin' on ch-ch-ch-cheese, a little vino.

Crawl: Have you ever heard of the tooth fairy?
Zack: No.
Crawl: I wouldn't fall asleep if I were you.

Zack: Why do they call you Crawl?
Crawl: Because that's how I used to get home my freshmen year.