Julian Goldstein: What are you afraid of?
Marley Corbett: I'm scared this entire night's gonna go by and you'll never wanna kiss me.
Gil: I'm having trouble because I'm a Hollywood hack who never gave real literature a shot.
Mr. Popper: Hello! I have to send the penguins back.
Voice On Phone: Send-da-penguin?
Mr. Popper: Yes, send penguins.
Dave Harken: You can't win a marathon without putting some bandaids on your nipples!
Jake Adams: Well if I wasn't your first, at least I can be your last.
Ally Darling: Why? Are you going to rape and kill me?
Kate Reddy: I love being a mother of a two-year old. It is like being a movie star in a world without critics.
Stan Harris: Nothing beats New York on New Years Eve.
Jesse Richter: When I'm about to kiss you, you'll know it.
Eva: You make me wanna stop sleeping with a bunch of guys.
Doug Glatt: That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
Malcolm: I'm not even wearing a clean pair of Granny panties.
Norah: I waited so long for this lie to come true, that I finally paid someone to tell the truth for me.
Ed Freel: I'll go to the papers if I have to.
Dr. Alfred Jones: When things get tricky in my life, I talk to my fish.
Tunde: Look at you, Asbo children. Timone and Pumba! And You! Why are you dressed like a strawberry ice cream?
Jeff: You know what? I have a asshole for a brother and it breaks my heart.
Tina: But I got your back now Noah, because I found out you got some big ass balls, man.
Noah Griffith: Can't buy underwear, balls don't fit.
Shun Kazama: There's no future for people who worship the future, and forget the past.