Kim Baker: I'm wondering if you can give me something... On background, just about the security situation here and the state of the war in general.
General Hollanek: Yeah, I can give you something... This war's like fucking a gorilla, you keep on going until the gorilla wants to stop.
Kim Baker: I think I can paraphrase that.
General Hollanek: Knock yourself out.
Admiral Parnell: President Truman has chosen you and your crew to lead a highly classified mission.
News Anchor: Now to the question that has no clear answer. How did two twenty-something young men land a three-hundred-million-dollar Pentagon contract?
Kaiser Wilhelm II: I'm ashamed to say that before and after my first marriage I, myself, fathered at least two illegitimate children: one with an Austrian countess, another with a French prostitute who was known in court circles as Madame L'Amour. Both of them, incidentally, blackmailed me for huge sums of money, the Countess and the prostitute. I expected better of the prostitute.
Janet: Did you ever do promotion for Kindergaten Cop, the movie?
Jake: I saw the movie. I know there are people who saw me with that movie, but that was it.