Quotes from Eddie Murphy movies and TV shows - page 6 of 7

Mushu: I'm doomed! And all 'cause Miss Man decides to take her little drag show on the road.

Mushu: You know, we have to work on your people skills.

Mushu: Go get her? What's the matter with you... After this Great Stone Humpty-Dumpty mess, I'd have to bring her home with a medal to be let back in the temple. Wait a minute! That's it! I'll make Mulan a war hero, and the ancestors will be begging me to come back. That's the master plan! Oh, you've done it now, man.

Mushu: I was this close. This close to impressin' the ancestors, gettin' the top shelf, an entourage. Man. All my fine work. Pfft.

Mushu: Did you see those Huns? They popped out of the snow, like daisies.

Rasputia: Hey Norbit, what you lookin at?
Norbit:Just some kids coming down the slide,
Rasputia: Oh I see, You're watching the bitch come down the slide. I'll show you how a bitch come down a slide.

Buddy Love: Well if it isn't the creator of Jumbo the Horny Hampster.
Dean Richmond: Please.

Jason: You're losing your intelligence, sir.
Sherman Klump: Yeah, I know. I can't even beat Molly and she's the dumbest hampster we got.

Grandma Klump: Does Cletus know I'm strapped?
Papa Klump: Come on, shoot.
Grandma Klump: I'm strapped, ni**a.

Papa Klump: Would you please put your clothes back on? You look like a roast chicken.

Papa Klump: If I want to put a trumpet in my ass and run around this restaurant and blow, then "Hallelujah!Yankee Doodle!" that's my business.

Grandma Klump: The other day I got out the shower and I bend down to reach for a towel, and I felt a sharp pain in my chest. Shot through my chest and up around my shoulder and down my spine. I thought "Oh, Lord." I thought I was dying. I bent over and looked, and I was standing on my own titty.
Mama Klump: You don't need a breast reduction, just be more careful.
Grandma Klump: Both feet, too. Both feet.

Papa Klump: What I do in my bedroom is MY business, you understand that?
Grandma Klump: The only thing you do in your bedroom is pull the lint off your scrotum.

Sherman Klump: Buddy Love, I am sick, and tired, of your S-H.
Dean Richmond: I.
Sherman Klump: Thank you. T-E.
Buddy Love: Oh, ho-ho-ho. My shite?

Jason: Professor? You okay?
Sherman Klump: Yeah. I just don't wanna hurt her, Jason.
Jason: Then you won't. Hey, you CAN control Buddy.
Sherman Klump: You know it's funny how you get used to certain things in life. You get used to being overweight. I know I did. You even get used to people making fun of you. Somewhere along the line, I got used to being alone. And I just don't want to be alone anymore.

Mama Klump: Well, I hope you fart until your asshole falls out!

Shrek: Ogres are like... Onions.
Donkey: They stink?
Shrek: Yes-No.
Donkey: They make you cry?
Shrek: Nooo!
Donkey: Oh, you put them out in the sun, they turn brown, start sprouting little hairs.
Shrek: Noooooooo!

Donkey: This is gonna be fun! We can stay up late, swap manly stories, and in the morning, I'm making waffles!

Donkey: And then one time I ate some rotten berries. Man, there were some strong gases seepin' outta my butt that day!

Donkey: Hi, Princess!
Princess Fiona: It talks!
Shrek: Yeah, it's getting him to shut up that's the trick.