Theo: You know what, the rest of you may hate your insomnia but I'm not sure I want a cure for mine. That's when I get all my best ideas... I'm alone, occasionally... with no distractions. My mind is racing with creative ideas and come 3am I feel like a genius.
Gilbert: Every theatrical performance is a contrivance by its very nature.
Sullivan: Yes, but this piece consists entirely of an artificial and implausible situation.
Gilbert: If you wish to write a Grand Opera about a prostitute, dying of consumption in a garret, I suggest you contact Mr Ibsen in Oslo. I am sure he will be able to furnish you with something suitably dull.
Homer Wells: They wanted a girl, Curly.
Curly: Nobody ever wants me.
Homer Wells: Oh, hey. Hey, come on. Come here. You know, you're one of the best, Curly, and we wouldn't let just anyone take you.
Curly: Dr. Larch wouldn't let just anyone take any of us.
Homer Wells: Well, that's true.
Curly: Nobody's asked for me, have they?
Homer Wells: Nobody special enough, Curly.
Curly: You mean somebody has?
Homer Wells: Only the right people can have you. Now what do you say we go unpack your suitcase?
Maggie Witzky: Why are you doing this?
Tom Witzky: Water softens up the dirt.
Stan: Love is just lust in disguise, and lust fades, so you damn well better be with someone who can stand you.
Rusty Zimmerman: You're ashamed of us, but we're not ashamed of you. As long as you go down on your Banana Republican knees and suck dick, you're my sisters, and I love you. And fuck off.
Sue Ryan: It's easy to be a bitch now that Brad Seldon's available.
Nicole: It's easy to be a bitch either way.
Tuptim: If love were a choice, who would choose such exquisite pain?
Virgil: I saw the horizon. It's out there. And though I may not ever be able to touch it, it's worth reaching for.
Bill Gates: Think they're hookers?
Paul Allen: Either that or motel inspectors. I saw one of them go into the room next to ours about a dozen times yesterday.
Sonny: I know this is the right thing because I would die for this kid just so he won't feel one ounce of sadness. That's why you're here right now, to protect me, to be scared for me to be a good father. And that's exactly what I'm gonna be.
Jordan Armstrong: You know, maybe if I had the luxury of getting my ass whooped, I could be calm right now. But I have been drinking tequila shots, my hormones are raging out of control, I'm emotional, I'm horny, and I don't wanna hear about no goddamn peas! Fuck you! Good night.
Rob Geller: See ya around the Cell Block, Mrs. Robinson.
Christmas Jones: Doctor Jones. Christmas Jones. And, no jokes. I've heard them all.
James Bond: I don't know any doctor jokes.
Sarah Lewis: I don't deserve heaven.
Ben Holmes: Oh Sarah, you deserve so much more than you think you do.
Nick Parks: C'mon, I made the ultimate sacrifice: 1 first class ticket for 3 economy.
Alice Marano: You'll never know what you ultimately sacrificed.
Betsy Jobs: You kicked Checkers, you're prejudiced and you have a potty mouth.
