Clifford Stern: What are you bothering with this guy for? I mean, you know, he's such a pompous bore and your show does such great profiles.
Halley Reed: Well, listen, I'll tell you, just between you and me, I wanted to do Gabriel García Márquez.
Clifford Stern: That's perfect.
Halley Reed: They like to mix it up. They like a little variety. After all, he is an American phenomenon.
Clifford Stern: Yeah, but so is acid rain.
Police Chief Spiro T. Edsel: Use unnecessary force, if necessary.
Brian Kelly: I don't know what's worse: getting blown up in nuclear war or having a 7-11 on every corner.
Ron Anderson: Listen, Dexter, is there something troubling you? Something that you would like to talk to someone about?
Dexter: Well, yes, as a matter of fact there is.
Ron Anderson: Then for fuck's sake talk to someone about it, will you? And sort it out before I sack you and hire a lobotomized monkey to play your role. Okay?
Daisy Werthan: It's 7:16.
Boolie Werthan: You should have a job on the radio announcing the time.
Bill Smith: The first rule is: Never sleep with anyone who's crazier than you are. I don't know if you're crazier, but you're right up there on the top 10 of my weird list, lady.
Louise Baltimore: If you knew me better, I'd be number one.
Bill Roberts: There's gonna be one more killing here tonight.
Det. Sherman: Think you could go for a babe with a dick?
Det. Frank Keller: Depends on her personality, really.
Felix Leiter: Where's my wife?
Dario: Don't worry. We gave her a nice Honeymooooon.
Martin: I realise you must have gone through hell.
Justin Jones: Gone? Bitch, we're still here.
Frank Baker: I'm sorry. I'm a bit wound up.
Jack Baker: Frank, you're a fucking alarm clock.
Putnam: All right, I'm looking for a couple of kids. This one's a mental case, have you seen them?
Pinball Teen: Does he dress like you?
Putnam: No.
Pinball Teen: Then he can't be too much of a case, all right?
Pete Sandich: There's something fishy going on here, and I don't think it's the chicken.
Col. Jason Grant: Oh, Christ. That's what we are - spare parts.
Capt. Fairbourne: Listen, you can no longer avoid history! I'm sorry. I've said that.
Learoyd: Shut up. History? The world's so full of crap, sooner or later, you're gonna step in it. You call that history?
Emmett Foley: When you come back a certified hero... it kind of raises people's expectations. Makes them think you're a big guy.