Greg Sanders: For the record, I really like having a penis.
Jeff: I love the word naked, it's brilliant isn't it, 'naked'. When I was a kid I used to write the word naked on a bit of paper hundreds of times and rub my face in it.
Dylan Hunt: It's a little known law of thermodynamics: The Conservation of Optimism: There's only so much to go around.
Christopher Titus: Cain slew Abel... oh, happy, happy Cain.
Original Cindy: He's from Manticore, huh? Say what you want - they sure know how to make 'em pretty.
Max Guevera/X5-452: Try spending an afternoon with him. He'll drive you crazy with his laughing, and his talking, and his breathing.
Original Cindy: Sugar, you got issues.
Steven Harper: Whenever you don't know what to do, choose the hardest thing, because nine times out of ten, that's the right thing to do.
Carver: I am going to be carp.
Tino: Did you say Carp?
Carver: That stands for what I want to be. Cool And Radically Popular.
Tino: It's a good thing you don't want to be Cool rich And Popular.
Carver: Why?
Col. Nick Fury: I can't let her go.
Wolverine: You can... and you will.
Fenella: Eustace has... dust allergies. Poor lamb. He must be having trouble... breathing.
Baron Harkonnen: And so it begins. The trap is set. The prey approaches. A glorious winter is about to descend on House Atreides and all its heirs, and very soon, the years of humiliation visited upon my family will finally be avenged.
Opening theme song: Yes, no, maybe, I don't know, can you repeat the question? You're not the boss of me now, You're not the boss of me now, You're not the boss of me now, and you're not so big. You're not the boss of me now, You're not the boss of me now, You're not the boss of me now, and you're not so big. Life is unfair.
Carl: If you need anything, you know who to look to. Someone else.
Larry: He insulted me. He implied that I was lying about my stepfather.
Jeff Greene: You don't have a stepfather.
Larry: I know, but I didn't like the implication.
Louis Stevens: I am making a quality cucumber shake here.
Ren Stevens: Not on my time.
Emmett: Pink champagne... yeah, uh, that's too nelly, even for me.
Buzz: There seems to be no sign of intelligent life anywhere.
Bernard: Natural Selection favours the loud and aggressive, no offense, but genetically you are a cul-de-sac.
Captain William Mitchell: Joel, where have you been?
Joel Rawlings: Sir, I was on a... secret mission. So secret, even you didn't know about it.
Captain William Mitchell: At the flower shop?
Michael: The fact is, now that Mum's "hands-off", it's like there's two Bens, and one of you has to go.
Ben: What?
Michael: You're expendable.
Ben: Erm, I'm what... Expendable?
Michael: You see? That's another thing. You're very slow on the uptake.
Ben: Michael, are you firing me?
Michael: Very, very slow.
Ben: I don't believe this. You can't fire me. I quit years ago.