Nick Halloway: Now you listen to me, you son of a bitch. I've lost everything but my soul, and you're not going to take that away from me.
Carol: Do you have any Equal?
Peter: I'm sorry, I'm famous for having no equal.
Margaret Schlegel: I deny it's madness.
Henry Wilcox: But you said yourself.
Margaret Schlegel: It's madness when I say it, but not when you say it.
Agent St. Anne: You don't know if Tuesdays come in twos or happening once a week.
Jake Wyer: I got a plan. Full frontal assault.
Sam French: A full-frontal assault. That's your plan?
Jake Wyer: It's got the element of surprise.
Sam French: Suicide is always surprising.
Montoya Santana: Whatever I did to you or to mama... to make you hate me, I'm sorry.
Pedro Santana: Your mother was a beautiful woman. She made me feel proud. She was 19 years old. Raped... by sailors. After it happened, we never talked about it. Then we got married and we tried to forget. When you were born, I tried to love you. But every time I looked at you, I wondered who your real father was. I wondered which sailor's blood you carried inside of you.
Charlie Chaplin: Syd, I love this country. I owe it everything. That's why I can make fun of it.
Paul Cater: I didn't GET this car, I stole it. That's a felony.
Lurene Hallett: Well it shouldn't be if it can't go over forty.
Zuzu Bailey: Look, Daddy! Every time you hear a bell, a zombie takes a soul to hell.
Peter Hoskins: What goes into one, Rita? A Long Island Iced Tea?
Rita Boyle: I'm sorry darling, I've forgotten.
Peter Hoskins: What, do you have it all written down behind the bar or something?
Rita Boyle: I'm on vacation.
Peter Hoskins: So you can't remember a drink recipe for something that I would like to order?
Rita Boyle: Peter, you're doing it again. You take a perfect situation and you pee all over it.
Al Bert: Like my ex-wife. Anything I say, she does the opposite.
Nick: How did you feel when I told you Johnny Boz had died, that day at the beach?
Catherine: I felt somebody had read my book and was playing a game.
Nick: But you didn't hurt.
Catherine: No.
Nick: Because you didn't love him.
Catherine: That's right.
Nick: Even though you were fucking him.
Catherine: You still get the pleasure. Didn't you ever fuck anybody else while you were married, Nick?
Newton Davis: Half the things we tell ourselves are fiction.
Gus Gilbert: You bury your own.
Jean-Baptiste: At age ten one doesn't know the world needs to be changed.
Roland T. Flakfizer: I didn't know the meaning of the word "no," but he had it down pretty good.
Man: If astrology were true -.
Sam: It is true! It is totally, totally, totally provable, you know?
Female Party Guest: Provable how? From gypsies?
Sam: Well, it's totally logical, right? You know, why wouldn't the position of the planets have an influence on our personalities?
Grandpa Sam Reaches: Knock it off! Knock it off! You remind me of a couple of old women.
Ray Levoi: He speaks English?
Walter Crow Horse: Yeah, only when he's really pissed off.
Ed Leland: Forget about dying. You're not allowed to die.
Linda Voss: I've never seen you look scared before.
Ed Leland: I don't want to loose you. I want to be with you, always.
Linda Voss: Oh God, you wouldn't say that unless you were sure I was gonna die.