President Grimshaw: I don't want to see you near my daughter again. That innocent little flower is my treasure.
General Graycliffe: A child with a stick of chewing gum has just rendered your hundred million dollars of hardware useless.
David 'Mo' Rutherford: You're Chocolate Chip Charlie.
'Chocolate Chip' Charlie W. Hobbs: Well, I sure as hell ain't the Kentucky Colonel.
Blossom: I'm Blossom. Why do they call you Meat?
Meat Tuperello: Why do they call you Blossom?
Clark Griswold: There's Buckingham Palace, kids. That's where the Queen lives and works.
Audrey Griswold: Works? What does she do, Dad?
Clark Griswold: She queens... and vacuums.
Liza Chamberlain: Cody, do you cook?
Cody Abilene: Not much.
Liza Chamberlain: Well, what do you usually make for dinner?
Cody Abilene: Reservations.
Shinyuki: The Black Star Ninja has betrayed the code.
Joe: Then... he must die.
Mombi III: Not beautiful you understand, but you have a certain prettiness, different from my other heads. I believe I'll lock you in the tower for a few years until your head is ready. And then I'll take it.
Dorothy: I believe you will NOT!
Rachel Lapp: Are you enjoying your reading?
John Book: Oh yeah. I'm learning a lot about manure. Very interesting.
David Howard: As the boldest experiment in advertising history, you give us our money back.
Desert Inn Casino Manager: I beg your pardon?
Monty Brewster: Why is it when there's trouble we're the ones that get into it. I mean, there's a bar full of people and we're the only ones in jail.
Spike Nolan: I don't think it's racial you know, because I'm in here with you.
Monty Brewster: That's comforting.
Bobby: I got it covered.
Alison: You'll never believe what I wanted to be when I was six.
Gib: A classics professor?
Sally Ann: Polly got in one good peck before that cat killed her. Good for Polly.
Hugh: I certainly never realised that Polly had such a big pecker.
Alan Stanwyk: You'll be wearing rubber gloves. Do you own rubber gloves?
Fletch: I rent 'em. I have a lease with an option to buy.
Richard Chance: I'm gonna bag Masters, and I don't give a shit how I do it.
Gene Harbrough: You may not be the biggest stud, Jonathan. But, at least you have a family.
Jonathan Bellah: You can have my brother.
Shirley: Oh, thank you, Baba Rama Nana!