Quotes from Michael Richards movies and TV shows

Kramer: It's a write off for them.
Jerry: Write it off what?
Kramer: They just write it off.
Jerry: You don't even know what a write off is, do you?
Kramer: Do you?
Jerry: No, I don't.
Kramer. Well they do, and they're the ones writing it off.
Jerry: I wish I had the last 20 seconds of my life back.

Cosmo Kramer: Boy, these pretzels are makin' me thirsty.

Cosmo Kramer: If you don't wanna be a part of society, just get in your car and move to the East Side.

The Voice - S9-E2

Kramer: They're redoing the Cloud Club.
Jerry: Oh, that restaurant on top of the Chrysler Building? Yeah, that's a good idea.
Kramer: Of course it is. It's my idea.
Jerry: Which part? The renovating the restaurant you don't own part, or the spending the two hundred million you don't have part?

The Keys - S3-E23

Kramer: You're wasting your life.
George: I am not. What you call wasting, I call living. I'm living my life.
Kramer: Okay, like what? No, tell me. Do you have a job?
George: No.
Kramer: You got money?
George: No.
Kramer: Do you have a woman?
George: No.
Kramer: Do you have any prospects?
George: No.
Kramer: You got anything on the horizon?
George: Uh...no.
Kramer: Do you have any action at all?
George: No.
Kramer: Do you have any conceivable reason for even getting up in the morning?
George: I like to get the daily news.

Bishop73

The Chinese Woman - S6-E4

Jerry: Well, it looks like you've adjusted to the boxers.
Kramer: Well, I wouldn't go as far as that.
Jerry: You went back to the Jockeys?
Kramer: Wrong again.
Jerry: Oh no...
Elaine: What? What?
Jerry: Don't you see what's going on here? No boxers, no Jockeys.
Elaine: [move back away from Kramer.] Ohhh.
Jerry: The only thing between him and us is a thin layer of gabardine. Kramer, say it isn't so.
Kramer: Oh, it be so. I'm out there, Jerry, and I'm loving every minute of it.

Bishop73

The Subway - S3-E13

Kramer: All right, Coney Island? OK, you can take the B or the F and switch for the N at Broadway and Lafayette. Or you can go over the bridge to DeKalb and catch the Q to Atlantic Avenue then switch to the IRT, 2, 3, 4, or 5. But don't get on the G. See, that's very tempting, but you wind up on Smith and 9th street, then you gotta get on the R.
Elaine: Couldn't he just take the D straight to Coney Island?
Kramer: Well yeah.

Bishop73

Richard Rietti: Maybe he's the person that he con'd the most. I mean we all do that, you know. We all keep a little bit of ourselves hidden. Cuz if we didn't, well, then we'd have to look at who we are. Who we really are. And if we didn't like it, well, we'd have nobody to blame but ourselves.

Stanley Spadowski: Friends, there comes a time in every man's life when he has to look the potato of injustice right in the eye.