Leonard Bernstein: Can I tell you a secret? Do you know I slept with both of your parents?
Lady Houston: I don't love the government, but I do love my country.
Draco: That naked strumpet wears our father's ring.
Chrysagon: Then honor it, and her.
Lt. Schill: It is a good feeling for a soldier if he knows that a girl is crying for him.
Elvis: No, that's cool man. Buzz sent me one too.
Oscar Wilde: Iced champagne is a favorite drink of mine, much against my doctor's orders.
Sir Edward Carson: Never mind your doctor's orders.
Oscar Wilde: I never do.
Samos: Who can understand the way of the gods? They create lovely girls and then turn them into wives.
Bothos: Quintus, what's she doing?
Brick: She's a Pict and a woman - two good reasons not to trust her.
Reichsmarschall Hermann Wilhelm Göring: One German, a fine man. Two Germans, a party. Three Germans, a war. One Englishman, an idiot. Two Englishmen, a club. Three Englishmen, an Empire.
Ray Kroc: If you've got time to lean, then you've got time to clean.
Julius Ceasar: When Alexander the Great was ten years younger than I am today, he had conquered the entire civilized world.
Vercingetorix: At your age, he was dead.
Julius Ceasar: All the more reason to hurry.
Flight Lt. Peter Ross: Hello.
Maria Gonzar: Hello.
Flight Lt. Peter Ross: So... you weren't killed.
Maria Gonzar: No... I hardly ever am.
Reporter: Y'know some are sayin' that it really was the cops who shot those men.
Bugs Moran: You must be new to this town, mister. Only Al Capone kills like that.
Undersecretary Martin Luther: Sir, this is Neumann of the Four Year Plan, a close associate of Reichsmarschall Goering. Neumann, I introduce Dr. Klopfer, a close associate of the Brown Eminence.
Erich Neumann: Brown... excuse me?
Klopfer: I represent Martin Bormann, the Party Chairman of the Thousand Year Plan.
Corporal Erkki Somppi: Paavo, you stay here.
Paavo Hakala: Is this a bad spot?
Soldier that leaves the position.: Nothing but bad spots here, pal.
Edward II: I here create thee Lord High Chamberlain, Chief Secretary to the State and me, Earl of Cornwall, King and Lord of Man.
Piers Gaveston: My Lord, these titles far exceed my worth.
Edward II: Thy worth sweet friend is far above my gifts. And therefore to equal it, receive my heart.
Man-seob: His English is even worse than mine.
Field Marshal Keitel: Have you any better suggestions?
Field Marshal Gerd von Runstedt: Yes, one very much better. Make peace, you idiot.
Sofia: If you have any objections, kindly go to hell.
Todd Jackson: You tell 'em.