See Dick Continue to Run, Continued (3) - S2-E2
Evil Dick: Stay and witness my moment of glory, as I impregnate the entire population of Ohio with my demon progeny.
Tommy: Wait, wait. Even the men?
Evil Dick: Okay, not the men.
Sally: What about little girls?
Evil Dick: Mmm, no, not them.
Tommy: What about elderly women?
Evil Dick: I don't think so.
Harry: What about women who are already pregnant?
Evil Dick: Oh, shut up, all of you! Okay, so apparently I won't be impregnating the entire population of Ohio. But all fertile women of child-bearing age who are not currently pregnant, and that's a lot!
Fifteen Minutes of Dick - S2-E23
Mary: Dick, why are you so upset about this? What do you want?
Dick: Fame. I wanna live forever. Light up the sky like a flame. Fame.
Frankie Goes to Rutherford - S5-E19
Don: Come on, Sally, we're late.
Sally: Oh, gosh, OK.
Harry: Where you guys going?
Don: Uh, we're going to see the Kenny Loggins Experience. Yeah, they're a Kenny Loggins tribute band.
Tommy: Oh, they sound just like him?
Don: Well, I hope not. I hate Kenny Loggins. (00:08:00)
Dick and the Single Girl - S2-E24
Harry: You know, I bet I could write a killer "X-Files."
Tommy: I could write one in my sleep.
Harry: I could write one hanging upside down.
Tommy: I could write one with a crayon.
Harry: I could write one if I lost both my arms and had to type with my feet.
Dick: I wanna watch one! Why don't you shut up and go write one!?
Tommy: Fine then, we will. Come on, Harry.
Harry: Yeah, come on.
Dick: Good, and when it's on TV I'll talk all through the damn thing and see how you like it! (00:01:35)
Don: Congratulations, Dick, you got yourself a hell of a rhymer. I mean, I've tried to rhyme, you know. There was a dog who sat on a log, his name was...Rog? That sorta thing. Hold on to her, Dick. She's one of a kind.
Dick: So you like the the rhyming, eh? You like the rhyming?
Don: Yeah.
Dick: And what if the rhyming were never to stop? On, on, and on till your head doth pop. Oh, look! A book! A book on schnook! What kind of crook took my schnook nook book? Perchance, methinks, thee, hither, yon, thou. I think I'm going to have a freakin' cow!
Don: You sure seem to hate her, sounds really tough.
Dick: Hate is a strong word, but not strong enough.
Dick Jokes - S2-E11
Dick: You know, it's a remarkable feeling to be able to make someone else laugh. It's almost as if you have the power to get inside their brain and, and tickle it.
Harry: Pssh. I could do that with a chopstick.
Dick: Imagine how different war would be if instead of trying to kill each other, people just showed up armed with jokes.
Sally: But you could still have guns, right? Because, you know, eventually you'd stop laughing and want to get on with the killing.
