Adventures in Babysitting (1987)

Daryl: Don't touch it! It could get infected, Jesus! He could get anything - Tetanus, rabies, scabies, emphysema.

Chris: I don't think your parents will ever ask me to babysit again.
Brad: If they do, I'd ask them for a buck more an hour.

College Girl: I'm so lonely.
Daryl: How could a righteous babe like you be lonely?
College Girl: That's the sweetest thing anybody's ever said to me.
Daryl: Really?
College Girl: Wanna go to bed?

Chris: So, when the babysitter looked more closely at the kids, she saw that... they HAD no faces.
Sarah: Oh my God.
Chris: Just a pool of mushy goo.
Sarah: Like Spaghetti-O's?
Chris: Spaghetti-O's with meat.

Chris: Now boys, if either of you give me any grief I swear to God I'll kill you. Dead, murdered, stabbed.
Daryl: Raped?
Chris: I'm too old for this crap.

Daryl: You gotta be shitting me.
Chris: Watch your mouth.
Daryl: Watch my mouth? You gotta be shitting me.

John Pruitt: Good luck Babysitter.
Chris: You too Mr. Pruitt.

Dr. Nuhkbane: There you are, one stitch, all better.
Brad: One stitch?
Dr. Nuhkbane: Oh, yes, one stitch.
Brad: My only shot at ever being in a gang fight and all I get is one stitch? Chris is gonna think I'm a total failure.

Daryl: Did you steal all of these cars?
Joe Gipp: Yeah. It gets me some good money.
Daryl: Isn't it kind of dangerous?
Joe Gipp: Hey, I like danger, all right?
Chris: You should try babysitting.

Brad: Where we gonna get 50 bucks?
Sarah: We could sell Daryl. You think?

Old Man: Get outta my house.

Daryl: This is weird.
Chris: You're weird.
Daryl: Hahahahaha.

Chris: What should I do?
Sarah: Get in the car and run him over.

Chris: Who was at the door?
Brad: Stray dog.

Brad: Daryl, why are you hugging me?
Daryl: Brad, don't you ever die on me! Ever.
Brad: O.K. I won't.

Daryl: Brad, you wouldn't believe what that girl would do for twenty bucks.