Bridget Cardigan: We'll think outside the box.
Don Cardigan: Well that's good because we're selling the box and moving into a smaller box.
Eric: What is scary about commitment is that your life becomes real. It is not a plan, it is not what you had hoped for - it is real.
Ray Tierney: When we were kids, all we ever talked about was being cops.
Narrator: How different things might have been for Ben had his nose-picking and day-dreaming been able to continue. Had he believed praise when he heard it, and had he decided, against all hope, to send his manuscript to Harper Collins.
Tess Finnegan: Nigel, I'm so sorry, but she's gotta learn that there's better ways to get attention than acting like a bimbo.
Alfonz: Like what?
Freya: If you truly believe that you write the tale of your life, then the end is up to you.
Richard Nixon: I let them down. I let down my friends, I let down my country, and worst of all I let down our system of government, and the dreams of all those young people that ought to get into government but now they think; 'Oh it's all too corrupt and the rest'. Yeah... I let the American people down. And I'm gonna have to carry that burden with me for the rest of my life. My political life is over.
Guard at Liberty Gate: What were you doing out there?
Staff Sergeant William James: Visiting a whorehouse.
Guard at Liberty Gate: Okay. If I let you back in, will you tell me where it is exactly?
Hater: This is my lesbian sister. Tell them about your softball team, tell them about your team.
Bertram Pincus: We live alone, and then we die alone. And apparently, we stay alone.
Molly Johnson: All the world's great civilizations have followed the same path. From bondage to liberty, from liberty to abundance, from abundance to complacency, from complacency to apathy, from apathy back to bondage. If we are to be the exception to history, then we must break the cycle, for those who do not remember the past are condemned to repeat it.
Mad Dog Maguire: When this is over, me and my boys get free drinks!
Jonathan Carnahan: You can have the whole damn bar! I'm getting the hell out of China!
Wendy Leather: So, come on then, what don't I know? Romantic dinner on Monday night?
Terry Leather: Look honey, I'm going to be working some strange hours over the next week or two, so don't ask me what I'm doing because I don't want to lie to you.
Driver: I envy you.
Ben Schwartzwalder: I won't tell him he'll be the next Ernie Davis, because there'll never be another Ernie Davis.
Christine Collins: Fuck you and the horse you rode in on.
Angie Ostrowiski: Stop framing your face.
Kate Holbrook: I think it works.
Angie Ostrowiski: It doesn't.
Arthur Seldom: Any formulation is valid in the series because we can always find a rule that justifies it.