Best comedy movie quotes of 2007

Jean Paul Clement: Most people are together just so they are not alone. But some people want magic. I think you are one of those people.

Dennis: I can lose weight, but you'll always be an asshole!

Turner Claymore: Here at Berm-Tech we offer you a handshake, whether you have hands, hooks, or flippers.

Lilly: Oh, come on. There was a time you'd have dragged me by my hair out of here for drinking.
Georgia: I'm too old. So's your hair.

Hertz: Come on, Smith, come on, guns don't kill people - but they sure help.

Joe Kingman: What did you put in those cookies?
Peyton Kelly: Um, milk, flour, eggs, cinnamon.
Joe Kingman: Cinammon? I'm allergic to cinnamon.
Peyton Kelly: I'm sorry.
Joe Kingman: You're sowry? I'm talking like t'his and all you can say is you're sowry?
Peyton Kelly: I'm allergic to nuts.

Mackenzie Carpenter: Lenny couldn't find his ass with both hands.

Mr. Edward Magorium: Mortamer fetch.
Mr. Edward Magorium: Stupid zebra.

Glen the Desk Clerk: Hello, welcome to the International Inn. How many?
Lieutenant Jim Dangle: There's 8 of us.
Glen the Desk Clerk: 8, 8 people for a suckfest.
Lieutenant Jim Dangle: No, no suckfest. We're here for a convention.
Glen the Desk Clerk: I like convention too. I'm in a convention. A suckfest convention.

Ben Murphy: Hey, can I ask you a question?
Reverend Frank: Sure.
Ben Murphy: When did you really know that we were ready to get married?
Reverend Frank: The moment you told Joel that Sadie wasn't a fish, I knew it was meant to be. Besides, anybody who kicks a reverend's ass for his woman, you're A-okay in my book.

Wilson: Misanthrope seeks misanthrope. Honestly, if you respond to this ad then you are probably not the kind of woman I'd go out with. I guess I'm lonely and it's new years and I'm willing to embarrass the hell out of myself with this ad. About me: My girlfriends over the years have been intelligent and beautiful, in the end they have all broken my heart, whatever that means. My friend says I have to have a foto, so here it is. Talk to you soon. Wilson.

Jake Rodgers: I'm the Black Rambo.
Gina: ...Blambo?

Sasha: Two words: Duhh.

Big Stan: Now pick up your gold teeth. I'm gonna let you keep them this time. But if you come at me again, I'm gonna hang on to them like a Swiss banker.

Jack: This isn't Paris. This is hell.

John Farley: You have a father?
Mr. Woodcock: Of course I have a father, Farley, I'm not Jesus.

Silas: I gonna drop you like K-Fed.

Phil: I've gotta drop the kids off at the pool.
Juliette: We have a pool?
Phil: Uh, no.

Bill: They hate that I'm working at their bank. I hate that I'm working at their bank.

Benjamin: We are journalists! We can't do this. It is unethical... and insane.
Simon: It would be a pleasure to personally catch him.
Benjamin: By ourselves. By ourselves. We don't even have any weapons.
Simon: If I gave you a gun, would you know how to use it?
Benjamin: No.
Simon: Then what the fuck are you complaining about?
Duck: I told you. The moment you start drinking that Bosnian brandy, the devil's sitting in the corner, just laughing.