Best comedy movie quotes of 1988

Mr. Bobrucz: You, Fifi, can take your French fruit and stuff it up your big bird.

Holmes: The Shadow of Death. The gripping drama was the last play presented at the Orpheum. It closed after only one night, but not without garnering some praise. Harris in the Daily Telegram said, 'In an otherwise dismal evening, Reginald Kincaid provided some welcome laughs.'.
Wiggins: You said it was a gripping drama.
Holmes: It's unimportant now, isn't it?

Farmer Gene Green: What in the blue blazes is the circus doing here in these parts?

Steven: We are all Gods animated cartoons.

Ty Webb: You know I'm always shooting myself with one of those poison-dipped, crossbow darts. I don't know why they don't put a warning on those things.

Ilene: What do you miss most about sex?
Stacy: Whoo... I miss falling asleep with someone's arms around me. And the feeling of, mm.
Ilene: Orgasm? I love orgasms.
Stacy: Mmm. I'm sick of my Mighty Intruder vibrator with the flexible shaft and the textured head.

Fred: Okay, Ace? I get your arm working, you can do the rest yourself, right?
Johnny 5: Kay-O, Derf.
Fred: Fred.
Johnny 5: That's what I said. Derf.

Bishop73

Garfield: Commander Mendelsen? Commander Mendelsen, are you there?
Mendelsen: You have three minutes.
Garfield: What happened to four minutes?
Mendelsen: Well, I uh.
Garfield: You what?
Mendelsen: I had to go to the little - boys' room.
Garfield: I have a surprise for you, Commander. Take this.

Wyatt Earp: It's all true, give or take a lie or two.

Billy Johnson: I have to tell you something. Purple, he came from up there.

Regine Dandrige: Let's talk about blood, Mr. Vincent, it's very precious to me.

Sylvia Pickel: You're very brave.
Nick Deezy: Everybody looks brave holding a machinegun.

Albert: Jackson, why did you have to bring me along in the first place?
Action Jackson: You remind me of a old friend.
Albert: Then why didn't you bring your old friend?
Action Jackson: He's dead.
Albert: Damn, man why did you have to tell me that?

Mr. Lincoln: They'll make a movie about anything nowadays.

Roadrash: Must have been a rowdy crowd tonight.

Peter Plunkett: All I wanted to be was happily useless, you made me miserably useless.

Tara: They are gardeners and carpenters, they are not tomato men.

Vance: We do not want to end up with a low potassium level.
Pee-wee: Duh, Vance! You'd think I never went to agricultural junior college.

Pop: That judge in the orange skirt... Make yer pee pee harder than a ten pound bag a' nickel jawbreakers, you know what I mean?

Janis Zuckerman: I'm looking for a guy named Louie, fuzzy hair, crooked teeth, bug eyes. Has he been around lately?
Girl Punk: Suck shit through a tube.