Barney: Think of me like Yoda, but instead of being little and green I wear suits and I'm awesome. I'm your bro-I'm Broda!
Barney: Ted, tonight we're gonna go out. We're gonna meet some ladies, it's gonna be legendary. Phone-five! [Slaps cell-phone.] You didn't phone-five, did you? I know when you don't phone-five, Ted.
Ted: I'm gonna do what that guy couldn't, I'm gonna take the leap... Well, I guess that's not a perfect metaphor since... For me it's falling in love and for him it's... Death.
Barney: Actually, that is a perfect metaphor.
Marshall: I think we're going to wait on the baby thing. I mean I love babies. Babies rule. Pudgy arms and stuff. But, uh, they make you old. Kinda like this anchor weighing you down to one spot... Forever.
Claire: I'm three months pregnant.
Marshall: Not awkward, guys. Not awkward if we don't let it be awkward.
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