SpongeBob SquarePants

SpongeBob SquarePants (1999)

30 quotes

Dying For Pie / Imitation Krabs - S2-E6

Mr. Krabs: What's the most important rule here?
Spongebob: No free napkins?
Mr. Krabs: No, the other most important rule!
Spongebob: Only discuss the secret formula with Mr Krabs.
Mr. Krabs: As long as you do that, the formula is safe.
Squidward: I thought the most important rule was why do today what you can put off for tomorrow?
Mr. Krabs: But what's today, but yesterday's tomorrow?
Squidward: What?

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Spongebob's Last Stand - S7-E22

Mr. Krabs: Alright, Plankton! It's Eugene Krabs, here, with, What's-His-Name! Now come on out!
Plankton: I can't.
Mr. Krabs: Come on outside, and take what's coming to you!
Plankton: I really can't come outside!
SpongeBob: Why not?
Plankton: Because I'm already out here, you bumbling bottom feeders! Open your eyes for crying out loud!

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Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy / Pickles - S1-E6

SpongeBob: Wow, Mermaidman and Barnacleboy.
Patrick: It's too bad they're old.
SpongeBob: What do you mean, Patrick? Old people are the greatest. They're full of wisdom and experience.

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Chocolate With Nuts / Mermaid Man And Barnacle Boy V - S3-E11

Spongebob: Quick, Patrick. If you could have anything right now, what would it be?
Patrick: Um...more time for thinking?

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Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy / Pickles - S1-E6

Mermaidman: To the meatloaf! To the broccoli! Make sure you give extra broccoli to my young ward. The boy needs his vitamins.

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The Graveyard Shift / Krusty Love - S3-E13

Squidward: Years ago, at this very restaurant, the hatch-slinging slasher used to be a frycook, just like you. Only clumsier! And then, one night, when he was cutting the patties, it happened...
SpongeBob: He forgot the secret sauce?
Squidward: No.
SpongeBob: He didn't wash his hands?
Squidward: No!
SpongeBob: Irregular portions?
Squidward: NO! He cut off his own hand! By mistake!
SpongeBob: You mean like this?
[At every 'this', SpongeBob removes his arm and a new one grows back.]
SpongeBob: Or like this? Or this? Or this? But what about this? Or this? Or this? Or this?
Squidward: Except he wasn't a sponge!
SpongeBob: So?
Squidward: So it didn't grow back!

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Help Wanted / Reef Blowers / Tea at the Treedome - S1-E2

Mr Krabs: Do you smell it? That smelly smell. The smelly smell that smells...smelly.

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Valentine's Day / The Paper - S1-E16

Patrick Star: You broke my heart! Now I'm gonna break something of yours!

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MuscleBob BuffPants / Squidward, the Unfriendly Ghost - S1-E11

Squidward: Spongebob, are you trying to drive me to the nut house?
Spongebob: No. Just into this hole.

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Mr. Krabs: The health inspector is here! If he finds one health violation, he'll shut us down for good! We've got to do everything in our power to make sure he passes the Krusty Krab!
Spongebob Squarepants: But, Mr. Krabs, there's nothing to worry about. The Krusty Krab is the most perfect place in the universe.
Mr. Krabs: You really haven't got any brains at all, have you, son?

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[Spongebob and Patrick have just been fried by Man-Ray.]
Patrick Star: What's that smell?
Spongebob Squarepants: That, Patrick, is the smell of defeat.
Patrick Star: Oh, good. I thought it was my skin.

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Spongebob Squarepants: Oh, Gary! Why didn't you tell me I was pushing you too hard?
Gary: Meow!
Spongebob Squarepants: You did? Oh, Gary! Why didn't you tell me I wasn't listening?
Gary: Meow!
Spongebob Squarepants: You did?

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Spongebob Squarepants: We're not doing so well, Patrick. We need a new tactic.
Patrick Star: I got it! Let's get naked!
Spongebob Squarepants: No, lets save that for when we're selling real estate.

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Spongebob's Last Stand - S7-E22

Mr. Krabs: Come on, lad. Let's go give that Plankton a piece of our minds.
[SpongeBob literally rips out a piece of his head.]
SpongeBob: Think this piece should do the trick.

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Pizza Delivery / Home Sweet Pineapple - S1-E5

Squidward: [Answers phone.] Hello?
SpongeBob: Squidward!
Squidward: Is it time already for you to ruin my day?
SpongeBob: Squidward! Help me! My house is shrinking and I woke up this morning and it was getting smaller...oh no!
Squidward: Yep, it is.
[Patrick comes out from his rock.]
Patrick: Is it time already to ruin Squid's day? [Falls off rock onto his furniture then jumps out with a tuxedo on.] Hey, SpongeBob, don't start without me!

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Pizza Delivery / Home Sweet Pineapple - S1-E5

Squidward: Sponge, we gotta eat something.
Spongebob: I heard in times of hardship, the pioneers would eat coral. No, maybe it wasn't coral. Maybe it was sand, no, mud.
Squidward: Give me the pizza!
Spongebob: Wait, I remember now. It was coral!
Squidward: Give it to me!

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Pizza Delivery / Home Sweet Pineapple - S1-E5

Squidward: Will you let go of that stupid pizza, already?
Spongebob: I can't it's for the customer.
Squidward: Who cares about the customer?
Spongebob: I do!
Squidward: Well, I don't!

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MuscleBob BuffPants / Squidward, the Unfriendly Ghost - S1-E11

SpongeBob: I don't know how to say this Patrick, but our old pal Squidward, he's... He's pushing up daisies.
Patrick: Oh, I thought he was dead.

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SpongeBob SquarePants: I'm every bit as good as Larry, and if I'm not, then may I be struck by...
[Rumble of thunder.]
SpongeBob SquarePants: ... A flying ice cream truck.
[A shadow forms over SpongeBob.]
SpongeBob SquarePants: And live!

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Sandy, SpongeBob and the Worm / Squid on Strike - S2-E18

Patrick Star: We should take Bikini Bottom, and push it somewhere else!

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Squidward Tentacles: Welcome to the Krusty Krab, where it's almost as if the evolutionary clock ticks backwards.

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Squidward Tentacles: Spongebob, this is the final straw. I'm going to move so far away, that I will be able to brag about it. I would rather tear out my brain stem, walk out to the middle of the nearest four-way intersection and skip rope with it than continue living where I do now.
TV announcer: Hi, there. Is this the final straw? Do you want to move so far away that you can brag about it? Would you rather tear out your brain stem, walk out in the middle of the nearest three-way-
Squidward Tentacles: Four-way.
TV announcer: Four-way intersection and skip rope with it than continue living where you do now?

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Squidward Tentacles: Spongebob, there's something I've been wanting to say to you since the day we met. Goodbye.

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[Squidward believes Spongebob has swallowed an exploding pie.]
Squidward Tentacles: We gotta call the hospital!
Mr. Krabs: Won't do any good. I've seen this before. When that pie hits his lower intestine - boom!
Squidward Tentacles: You've seen this before?
Mr. Krabs: 11 times, as a matter of fact.
[Squidward calls the hospital anyway.]
Squidward Tentacles: Hello, doctor. Won't do any good? 11 times?!?

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[Squidward and Spongebob beleive robots are taking over the world.]
Squidward Tentacles: I'll evacuate the customers, you call the navy.
Spongebob Squarepants: Hello, operator. Get me the navy.
Phone recording: Hello, you've reached the navy's automated phone service.
Spongebob Squarepants: Squidward! The robots are running the navy!

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Spongebob Squarepants: Remember, Patrick. Flatter the customer. Make him feel good.
Fish: Hello?
Patrick Star: I love you.

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[Spongebob and Patrick have wrecked Mr. Krabs' first dollar.]
Patrick Star: This is all Mr. Krab's fault. If he hadn't had hung that stupid dollar in the first place. It's not as if it looks like any regular dollar. Why hang it? You could just stick any old dollar bill up on the wall and Krabs wouldn't know the difference! You might as well just reach into my wallet, take out a dollar, and put it on the wall.
Spongebob Squarepants: Patrick, take out your wallet.
Patrick Star: I don't see where you're going with this.

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The Chaperone / Employee of the Month - S1-E12

Squidward: I could win it with my tentacles tied!
SpongeBob: That can be arranged!

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That Sinking Feeling - S8-E1

Squidward: [Muttering angrily from inside his house.]
Spongebob: Aww, Squidward's house sounds like it has an upset tummy.
Patrick: Must have been something that it ate.
Squidward: [Opens door.]
Spongebob: [Points at Squidward.] It ate Squidward.
Patrick: That'll do it.

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bobthedancingdonut

Culture Shock / F.U.N. - S1-E10

Plankton: F is for fire to burn down the whole town, U is uranium, bombs. N is for no survivors.

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Mistakes

In "Procrastination" when Spongebob is moving back and forth on his chair while writing his essay there is no pencil on the desk, but when he goes back to work on the essay there is.

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Trivia

Whenever there is an accident involving the general population you can ALWAYS hear amongst the groans a man saying, "My leg..."Some examples are: 1. In the episode "Hall Monitor" when SpongeBob directs all the cars in the wrong direction, you can see a bunch of wrecked cars, and then you hear the recording "My leg..." 2. And in "Boating School" when SpongeBob crashes into the lighthouse you can hear a man moan "My leg..." 3. On "The Chaperone" episode, when all the kids at the prom get hurt during "The Sponge" song you can hear "My leg..." 4. This is the one in "Culture Shock" where Squidward puts on a talent show.When Pearl puts on her performance, and jumps up and down, people start crashing through the air.At this part the "My leg..." sound is heard 5. On "Sleepy Time, when SpongeBob is in Plankton's dream, Plankton says "Peek-a-boo I see you, Zap!", and you hear "My leg..." 6. In the episode "Aarrgh!", a fish walks in the Krusty Krab and says "Whip up those patties Crabs." and something else, and Mr.Krabs throws him out and he says "My leg..." 7. In "Walking Small", when SpongeBob gets out his towel, he fans all the sound out of it.All the fish leave instantly.You can hear the recording "My leg..." 8. On "Karate Choppers", when SpongeBob knocks a guy out thinking he's Sandy he says "My leg..." 9. And in "Something Smells" when SpongeBob makes the marching band fall over and fly everywhere you can, once again hear "My leg..." Also, in the movie, a joke was made on this, where instead he says "My eyes!"

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