M*A*S*H

Frank Burns: The men hate me, don't they?
Radar: Just your guts, sir.

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Frank Burns: You disgust me!
Hawkeye: You're right, Frank... I discussed you with everyone I know and we all find you disgusting.

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Frank Burns: I know I'm a real asset.
Hawkeye: You're only off by two letters.

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Frank Burns: Courage is something you shouldn't be afraid to have.

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Frank Burns: I wonder if I can say something useful?
Trapper: I often wonder that too, Frank.

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Frank Burns: I'm taking this to a higher authority.
Trapper: Aw, Frank... You're not going to write your mother again.

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PA System: Attention all personnel. Due to the shortage of oil and wood, tonight's movie will be burned at 1800.

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Radar: Sir, I was just crossing the compound when...
Frank Burns: I have no interest in the compound.
Klinger: He has no compound-interest.

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Radar: Sir, there's someone waiting to see you.
Henry Blake: I was born with someone waiting to see me.

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Henry Blake: Will you stop saying what I'm thinking?
Radar: One of us has to.

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Maj. Burns: You're losing half your apple sauce. Apples don't grow on trees, you know.

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PA System: Due to circumstances beyond our control, lunch will be served today.

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Margaret: Act like a man, you sniveling twerp!

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Colonel Flagg: I could kill you with one finger.

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Colonel Flagg: You think you're real smart. But you're not smart; you're dumb. Very dumb. But you've met your match in me.

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Hawkeye: If you act drunk long enough, you get a REAL hangover.

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Frank Burns: I love it here.
Col. Potter: Either you or Klinger is nuts. Now I have to figure out which one.

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Henry Blake: You're always wrong, Frank. That's what's so right about you.

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Dr. Sidney Freedman: I haven't washed my hands since I became a psychiatrist.

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Col. Potter: Please excuse these two, they're themselves today.

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Henry Blake: Do we have enough sherry and ginger-ale for the General?
Radar: Oh, nobody does, sir.
Henry Blake: Oh, fine then, if nobody does we don't have to, but make sure we do, just in case we don't.

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Margaret: Oh, Frank. You're so above average.

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Frank Burns: Funny thing, war: never have so many suffered so much so so few could be so happy.
Margaret: We're lucky to be two of the few and not the many.
Frank Burns: I know, darling, and I love being both of us.

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Mistakes

Hawkeye calls a number of people into the mess tent over the PA - the ones he allegedly suspects of being behind the thefts he is suspected of himself. Interestingly enough, Ho Jon, later revealed to be the guilty party, is not on Hawkeye's list - yet he shows up uninvited, just to be ensnared by Hawk's clever ploy. Note also that he had no way of knowing what the purpose of the meeting was, so we cannot ascribe to him the motive of wanting to find out how much Hawkeye knew.

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Trivia

Season 4. Episode 1 "Welcome To Korea". At the end of the episode the new commanding officer, Colonel Sherman Potter, played by Harry Morgan is introduced. In Season 3 Episode 1 "The General Flipped at Dawn", Harry Morgan played Major General Bartford Hamilton Steele.

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