Barney: The Padres play the Mets every so often, though you folks would probably be Yankees fans. It's been my experience that most organized crime people are.
Vincent 'Vinnie' Antonelli: I love the Yankees, Linda loves the Yankees, so does Terry.
Linda: Who's Terry?
Vincent 'Vinnie' Antonelli: You are.
Vincent 'Vinnie' Antonelli: Ehh, she's not my type. I like 'em... I dunno, kinda dirty or something.
Justin: Who's that?
Gil: It's my kid brother, Larry, your uncle. Don't give him any money.
Justin: I won't.
French journalist: Inspector, do you know if the killer was a man or woman?
Inspector Jacques Clouseau: Well of course I know that! What else is there? A kitten?
Charlie: Ten more seconds and I'm leaving! Ten-
Roxanne: What did you say?
Charlie: I said ten more seconds and I'm leaving.
Charlie: What did you think I said?
Roxanne: I thought you said earn more sessions by sleeving.
Charlie: What does that mean?
Roxanne: I don't know. That's why I came out.
Charlie: What a waste of an opportunity. You have THIS in front of you, and all you can think of is 'Big Nose'?!
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