Quotes from Andrew Dice Clay movies and TV shows
Ford Fairlane: I could've been a rock singer, if only I hadn't been banned from MTV. Long story. But anyway, I only know that one song. Well, I do a mean "Puff the Magic Dragon," but only in the nude. Longer story.
Ford Fairlane: Excuse me, did I hear the f-word out of you? You say "fuck" again and I'll bang you right to fuck. Now get the fuck out of here.
Lt. Amos: You think you are so hot 'cos you get in all the clubs, heh? Just because you have sex with great looking women.
Ford Fairlane: You got to admit those are pretty good reasons.
Ford Fairlane: Here's to you, Johnny. Sucking my dick. (toasting with Johnny Crunch at the radio station).
Ford Fairlane: Johnny was the only guy who could out-disgust me. When we were kids we had gross-out contests. I coughed a pile of phlegm on a table, he said "Nice try." and pulled out a straw.
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