Kaley Cuoco

Quotes from Kaley Cuoco movies and TV shows

Pilot - S1-E1

Penny: Four years I lived with him! Four years, I mean that's like as long as high school!
Sheldon: It took you FOUR YEARS to get through high school?

Pilot - S1-E1

Penny: So, what do you guys do for fun around here?
Sheldon: Well, today we tried masturbating for money.

The Vacation Solution - S5-E16

Howard: I'm not signing a pre-nup.
Penny: Alright, Howard Wolowitz, listen up. You sign anything she puts in front of you because you are the luckiest man alive. If you let her go, there is no way you will be able to find anyone else. Speaking on behalf of all women, it is not going to happen, we had a meeting!

Brad Premium member

The Guitarist Amplification - S3-E7

Penny: Wow, Sheldon. I had no idea you made a board game.
Sheldon Cooper: Oh, Research Lab is more than just a board game. As it says in the box, "the physics is theoretical, but the fun is real."
Leonard Hofstadter: We must not be playing it right.

The Vegas Renormalization - S2-E21

Sheldon: I'm homesick
Penny: Your home is 20 feet from here!
Sheldon: 20 feet, 20 light years, doesn't matter.

The Vegas Renormalization - S2-E21

Sheldon: While my compatriots are in Las Vegas, I will be enjoying a blissful evening in my personal Fortress of Solitude.
Penny: That's Superman's big ice thingy, right?
Sheldon: You know, I'm in such a good mood, I'm actually finding your tenuous grasp of the English language folksy and charming today.

Cubs Fan

The Communication Deterioration - S8-E21

Penny: You are a wise man.
Sheldon: Well, Penny, who's smarter, the wise man or the person who comes to him for advice?
Penny: Oh, I guess you're right. Maybe it is the person who asks.
Sheldon: No. It's the wise man. That's why he's called the wise man. You know how I know that? I'm the wise man.


The Loobenfeld Decay - S1-E10

Penny: Sheldon, have you any idea what time it is?
Sheldon Cooper: Of course I do. My watch is linked to the atomic clock in Boulder, Colorado. It's accurate to one-tenth of a second. But as I'm saying this, it occurs to me that you may have again been asking a rhetorical question.

The 21-Second Excitation - S4-E8

Bernadette: I really love Howard's chest hair.
Penny: Howard has a hairy chest?
Bernadette: No, just the one, but it's really long.

The Classified Materials Turbulence - S2-E22

Penny: What the hell is that?
Wolowitz: Meatloaf.
Leonard: What was it doing on the ceiling?
Wolowitz: That's classified.

Penny: Can you help me? I was writing an email and the A key got stuck. Now it's just going "Aaaaaaa."

The Intimacy Acceleration - S8-E16

Sheldon: Just out of curiosity, Penny, if this experiment does make us fall in love, would you drive me to Lake Geneva, Wisconsin, for Gary-Con? It's the only convention celebrating the life and work of Gary Gygax, the co-creator of Dungeons and Dragons.
Penny: You know what, I can honestly say if we fall in love, not only will I drive you there, I will buy you all the dragon T-shirts you want.
Sheldon: Okay, babe, let's do this.

Super Grover Premium member

The Intimacy Acceleration - S8-E16

Penny: If you were to die this evening with no opportunity to communicate with anyone, what would you most regret not having told someone?
Sheldon: So it would be today? Huh... Well, I suppose there's something satisfying about dying on my birthday.
Penny: Today's your birthday?
Sheldon: Yes.
Penny: Well that's always been a secret. Not even Amy knows.
Sheldon: Well, I don't enjoy presents. And the thought of people jumping out and yelling surprise fills me with more dread than the words "George Lucas Director's Cut."

Super Grover Premium member

The Panty PiƱata Polarization - S2-E7

Sheldon Cooper: Woman, you're playing with forces beyond your ken.
Penny: Your Ken can kiss my Barbie.

Ssiscool Premium member

The White Asparagus Triangulation - S2-E9

[Walking into Penny's apartment.]
Sheldon: Were you robbed?
Penny: Uh, no.
Sheldon: How can you be sure?

Ssiscool Premium member
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