Quotes from Alan Tudyk movies and TV shows

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Jaynestown - S1-E4

[About Jayne's statue.]
Wash: I think they captured him. Captured his esscence, you know?
Kaylee: He looks kinda angry.
Wash: That's kinda what I meant.

The Message - S1-E15

Mal: If he calls back, keep him occupied.
Wash: What do I do, shadow puppets?

Detective Spooner: Can a robot write a symphony? Can a robot turn a canvas into a beautiful painting?
Sonny: Can you?

Sonny: 2880 steps, detective.
Del Spooner: Do me a favor and keep that kind of shit to yourself.

Mal: Just get us on the ground.
Wash: That part will happen most definitely.

Wash: I don't know, but if she doesn't give more power to offset the burn through this landing is going to get very interesting.
Mal: Define interesting.
Wash: "Oh God, Oh God we're all going to die"?
Mal: [Talking into the intercom.] This the captain speaking. We might experience some turbulence, then explode.

Wash: I am a leaf on the wind, watch how I soar.

Tucker: He's heavy for half a guy.

Tucker: Holy shit. We have go to hide all of the sharp objects.

Dale: That's a PBR, buddy.
Tucker: That-that's a thing of beauty.

Tucker: When you see a college girl prancin' around in front of you half naked, you do not call out my name.

Tucker: What am I supposed to say, Dale?"Oh hidy-ho officer! We've had a doozy of a day. There we were minding our own business, just doing chores around the house when kids started killing themselves all over my property."
Dale: Yeah, yeah, just like that.
Tucker: They're never gonna believe that.
Dale: But that's exactly what happened.

[King Candy puts on a pair of glasses.]
King Candy: You wouldn't hit a guy with glasses, would you?
[Ralph takes off the glasses and hits him on the head with them.]
King Candy: You hit a guy with glasses. That's well played.

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