Sam Hall: Look, I got every question right on the final, and the only reason Mr. Spengler failed me is because I didn't write out the solutions.
Jack Hall: Why not?
Sam Hall: I do 'em in my head.
Jack Hall: Did you tell him that?
Sam Hall: I did. He said he didn't believe me. He said that if he couldn't do them in his head, then I must be cheating.
Jack Hall: Well, that's ridiculous! How can he fail you for being smarter than he is?
Sam Hall: That's what I said.
Jack Hall: You did? How did he take it?
Sam Hall: He flunked me, remember?
Davis: Dear Champion Vending Company: I put five quarters in your machine and proceeded to push B2, which should have given me peanut M&M's. Regrettably, it did not. I found this upsetting, as I was very hungry, and also my wife had died ten minutes earlier.
Karen: I can't have sex with you. It'd be dangerous.
Davis: There's that word again. Is Carl really out of town, or did you just chop him up into little pieces and stuff him in your sock drawer?
Karen: That's ridiculous. I don't have a sock drawer.
Davis: Well... where do you keep all your socks?
Karen: In the same drawer as my underwear.
Davis: What? I just... You know, I just think a woman's underwear is deserving of its own space.
Donnie: Life isn't that simple. I mean who cares if Ling Ling returns the wallet and keeps the money? It has nothing to do with either fear or love.
Kitty Farmer: Fear and love are the deepest of human emotions.
Donnie: Okay. But you're not listening to me. There are other things that need to be taken into account here. Like the whole spectrum of human emotion. You can't just lump everything into these two categories and then just deny everything else!
Brian Taylor: I am the police, and I'm here to arrest you. You've broken the law. I did not write the law. I may disagree with the law but I will enforce it. No matter how you plead, cajole, beg or attempt to stir my sympathy. Nothing you do will stop me from placing you in a steel cage with gray bars. If you run away I will chase you. If you fight me I will fight back. If you shoot at me I will shoot back. By law I am unable to walk away. I am a consequence. I am the unpaid bill. I am fate with a badge and a gun. Behind my badge is a heart like yours. I bleed, I think, I love, and yes I can be killed. And although I am but one man, I have thousands of brothers and sisters who are the same as me. They will lay down their lives for me and I them. We stand watch together. The thin-blue-line, protecting the prey from the predators, the good from the bad. We are the police.
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