Oliver Martin: The thing is, how can I be there for her if I don't even have my thing figured out? You know?
Oliver Martin: Emily, I'm flat broke. I don't have a job. I don't have a plan. And I know, I know I'm probably six years too late, but will you give me strike one back?
Oliver Martin: Actually, I'm here visiting my brother. He's a lawyer. Well, he's going to be. He's in law school, so.
Emily Friehl: Is that what you wanna do, too?
Oliver Martin: I don't know. I just finished school.
Emily Friehl: Don't people usually graduate in June?
Oliver Martin: Yeah.
Emily Friehl: It's almost a year ago. You still don't have a job?
Oliver Martin: What are you, my mom?
Emily Friehl: I don't know, when you look at me, do you see your mom?
Jack Taylor: What's this I hear about you threatening to spray this play with an AK-47?
Tom Stansfield: Oh... well, I was just making a joke.
Jack Taylor: Oh that's funny to you? People dying? And what's this I hear about you making fun of midgets?
Tom Stansfield: I never make fun of midgets.
Jack Taylor: You said, it would be fun to date one because then you could rest your beer on their head, now I have a sense of humour, but that's just sick.
Eli: You know what the best part about my gay dads is?
Eli: They're never gonna eat out my ex-girlfriends.
Wallace: You and your dad are tunnel buddies, huh?
Elliot: You know, I've been thinking, we should have a secret handshake, and like nicknames and stuff. Like, I can call you Boogster, and you can call me the Incredible Mr. E. You like that? I just made it up.
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