Quotes from David Spade movies and TV shows

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Below are some quotes involving David Spade - click the title to view the complete list. If you think their finest moments are missing from the full list, please submit them.

[Playing baseball, Gus just hit a homerun.]
Richie: He just did that steroid free!
Clark: What's steroids?
Richie: Something that makes your pee-pee smaller.
Clark: There must be steroids in macaroni!

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Kuzco: This is Yzma, the emperor's advisor. Living proof that dinosaurs once roamed the Earth.

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Kuzco: Big, dumb and tone-deaf. I am so glad I was unconscious for all of this.

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Pacha: Oh no.
Kuzco: Let me guess, we're about to go over a huge waterfall.
Pacha: Yup.
Kuzco: Sharp rocks at the bottom?
Pacha: Most likely.
Kuzco: Bring it on.

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Kuzco: You know, it's a good thing you're not a big fat guy, or this would be really difficult.

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Lenny Feder: Higgy!
Marcus Higgins: Hey, what's up, Lenny? Buddy, I thought you were gonna start working out.
Lenny Feder: What does that mean?
Marcus Higgins: Um... You're fat.
Lenny Feder: No!

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Joe Dirt: So, you're gonna tell me, that you don't have no black cats, no Roman candles, or screamin' mimis?
Kicking Wing: No.
Joe Dirt: Oh come on man. You don't got no lady fingers, buzz bottles, snicker bombs, church burners, finger blasters, gut busters, zip-a-dee-do-dahs, crap flappers?
Kicking Wing: No, I don't.
Joe Dirt: You're gonna stand there, owning a firework stand, and tell me you don't have no whistling bungholes, no spleen splitters, whisker biscuits, honker lighters, huskers dus, husker don'ts, cherry bombs, nipsy dazers, with or without the scooter stick, or one single whisking kitty chaser?

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Bishop73

Tommy: You know a lot of people go to college for seven years.
Richard: I know. They're called doctors.

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Tommy: Does this suit make me look fat?
Richard: No, your face does.

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Cubs Fan

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