Quotes from Nicholas Brendon movies and TV shows

Same Time, Same Place - S7-E3

Spike: Come on, it's this way.
Xander: We should have put a leash on him.
Buffy: Yes, let's tie ourselves to the crazy vampire!

Potential - S7-E12

Xander: They'll never know how tough it is, Dawnie. To be the one who isn't chosen. To live so near to the spotlight and never step in it. But I know. I see more than anybody realizes because nobody's watching me. I saw you last night. I see you working here today. You're not special. You're extraordinary.

Grave (2) - S6-E22

Xander: I love you, Willow. I love crayon breaky Willow and I love scary veiny Willow. So if you're gonna end the world, you're gonna have to start with me!

Killed By Death - S2-E18

[Buffy accidently attacks Xander, and Xander jumps back.]
Xander: Man, Buffy. My life just flashed before my eyes. I gotta get me a life.

Cordelia: Do guns make you wanna have sex?
Xander: I'm 17, linoleum makes me wanna have sex.

When She Was Bad - S2-E1

Xander: Are we overlooking the possibility that she may be very attracted to me? ... She's possessed.

Prophecy Girl - S1-E12

Xander: You were looking at my neck.
Angel: What?
Xander: You were checking out my neck, I saw that.
Angel: No, I wasn't.
Xander: Just keep your distance, pal.
Angel: I wasn't looking at your neck.
Xander: I told you to eat before we left.

Season 1 generally

Xander: So, Buffy, how'd the slaying go last night?
Buffy: Xander!
Xander: I mean, how'd the laying go? No, I don't mean that either.

Two To Go (1) - S6-E21

Xander: Hey now - play nice, fellas, or you'll break our concentration.
Anya: Which means no protection spell...
Xander: And Willow will make sure you two boneless chickens are skinless, too.
Andrew: Then what? You think your Li'l Witch buddy's gonna stop with us? You saw her! She's a truck driving Magic Mamma. We've got maybe seconds before Darth Rosenberg grinds everybody into Jawa burgers, and not one of you bunch has the midiclorians to stop her.
Xander: You've never had any tiny bit of sex, have you?

Fool For Love - S5-E7

Xander: What's with the hand wave? You see that? Does that, like, mean something?
Willow: It's code. I think it breaks down to 'choo-choo!'
Anya: It probably means to follow him. That, or wait here for him.
Willow: [whispering.] Ask him.
Xander: [yelling.] Hey, Riley? What's the [hand gesture.] all about?
Riley: It means yell real loud so the vampires who don't know we're coming will have a sporting chance.
Xander: See, now he's all mad and sarcastic.
Willow: It's because you were doing all that yelling, Mr. Stealthy-pants.

End Of Days - S7-E21

Xander: Hey, party in my eyesocket and everyone's invited!

Seeing Red - S6-E19

Xander: I think it's the "daddy" thing that's throwing her. 'Cause incest? Not that sexy.

Dirty Girls - S7-E18

Xander: I've been through more battles with Buffy than you all can ever imagine. She's stopped everything that's ever come up against her. She's laid down her life - literally - to protect the people around her. This girl has died *two* times, and she's still standing. You're scared? That's smart. You've got questions? You should. But you doubt her motives, you think Buffy's all about the kill, then you take the little bus to battle. I've seen her heart - and this time not literally - and I'm telling you right now, she cares more about your lives than you will ever know. You gotta trust her. She's earned it.
[Pause.]
Faith: Damn. I never knew you were that cool.
Buffy: Well, you always were a little slow.

Innocence (2) - S2-E14

Xander: I think I'm having a thought. Oh yeah, that's a thought. [Gasp.] Now I'm having a plan!

When She Was Bad - S2-E1

Willow: I mean, why else would she be acting like such a b-i-t-c-h?
Giles: Willow, I think we're a little too old to be spelling things out.
Xander: A "bitca"?

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More Buffy The Vampire Slayer quotes

Mike: This whole night we've been worrying... there's some dark version of us out there somewhere. What if we're the dark version?

Mike: If we're collapsing right now, I'm gonna collapse on them. I'm not gonna wait for them to collapse on us.
Hugh: Whoa, whoa, Mike.
Mike: I'll go over there and I'll just kill 'em.

Hugh: Yeah, we're in a different reality because the reality where I am from, my best friend didn't sleep with my wife.
Mike: Hugh, do you not understand what I'm saying? This all started tonight, and if there are a million different realities, I have slept with your wife in every one of them.

Mike: No, we're not splitting up. We're just gonna go in two different groups.

More Coherence quotes

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