Adam Sandler

Quotes from Adam Sandler movies and TV shows - page 2 of 7

Archie Moses: This is a '70s porno. You know how I can tell? Because the guy's dick has sideburns.

More Bulletproof quotes

Michael Newman: Twinkie. Don't need it. You don't need it, man. You do need a Yodel, though. Good job.

Michael Newman: Sorry I'm late. Some idiot in a red Lamborghini parked in my spot.
Prince Habeeboo: Prince Habeeboo drive Red Lamborghini.
Michael Newman: Oh, did I say red Lamborghini? I meant blue Ferrari.

Michael Newman: It took that son of a bitch a whole year to promote me?

Michael Newman: I mean no disrespect, Prince Hubbida Hubbida.
Ammer: Hubba Bubba.
Prince Habeeboo: Habeeboo! Ha-bee-boo! Hubba Bubba is chewing gum. Prince Habeeboo is not chewing gum.

Donna Newman: Will you still love me in the morning?
Michael Newman: Forever and ever, babe.

Trudy: Hey, Michael. Michael, who are you talking to?
Michael Newman: Jesus. I'm talking to my boss, Ma. Take it easy.
Trudy: Oh, yeah? Well, tell him to get a life. You got family here. You're busy. Come on.
Michael Newman: My mother says hello.

Michael Newman: Thank you, Mom for having me, I know it was a lot of pain.
Trudy: You have no idea.

Michael Newman: Samantha. One day, you are going to be the hottest chick in the world, but you still gotta have brains. So tomorrow, I'm going to teach you Calculus.
Samantha Newman - Age 5: You know Calculus?
Michael Newman: Uh, I knew you'd call me on that, all right, your mother will teach you.

Michael Newman: Yes! Look at me. All showered and dressed and looking sexy. I like that. I.
Samantha Newman - Age 5: Did you smoke crack, Daddy?

Morty: Something stinks like stale French fries.
Michael Newman: Oh yeah, that's probably me.
Morty: You know, fast food shortens your life.
Michael Newman: That's what they tell me, but the way my life's going right now, that wouldn't be so bad.

Michael Newman: Samantha, is that you? When did you get boobs?
Samantha at 14 Years Old: Same time you did, Dad.

Morty: I'm gonna show you a remote we just got in that's probably the most advanced piece of technology that we have in this place.
Michael Newman: Sounds sweet.
Morty: It is sweet. The latest, greatest universal remote not even on the market yet.
Michael Newman: Ooh. I guess the O'Doyles' remote can kiss my advanced-technological ass then.
Morty: I don't know the O'Doyles, but... they can bite it hard.

More Click quotes

Max Simkin: Hey, Ma, let me ask you somethin'. You ever wish you were somebody else?
Sarah Simkin: No. I'm your mother. That's all I ever wanted to be.
Max Simkin: But... if you could do whatever you wanted to do, what would it be?
Sarah Simkin: Um... Have dinner with your father. That would be nice.

Max Simkin: I don't sell shoes, Mrs. Stevens.

Jimmy: I was always telling your pop he should sell this crap and make some money, but he can never throw anything away.
Max Simkin: Yeah, except his family.

More The Cobbler quotes

Whitey: That's a technical foul.

Eleanor Duvall: They were giving out free lobster bibs in the bathroom.
Whitey: That's not a lobster bib Eleanore its a germ protector for your tushey.

Eleanor Duvall: Hey, look! He already stole something.
Davey: It's a letter from my parents.
Eleanor Duvall: Well why don't you go live them?
Davey: They died.
Eleanor Duvall: My bad.

More Eight Crazy Nights quotes

Dr. Lars: It's too early to know who's winning the fight: the medicine or the disease.
George Simmons: Did anybody ever tell you, you have a very scary accent?
Dr. Lars: You are a very funny man. I enjoy your movies.
George Simmons: And I enjoy all of your movies.
Dr. Lars: Which movies?
George Simmons: The ones where you try to kill Bruce Willis.

More Funny People quotes

Join the mailing list

Separate from membership, this is to get updates about mistakes in recent releases. Addresses are not passed on to any third party, and are used solely for direct communication from this site. You can unsubscribe at any time.

Check out the mistake & trivia books, on Kindle and in paperback.