Quotes from Gary Cole movies and TV shows

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Ted Jones: Has anyone seen my bigger knife?

Reese Bobby: Remember, son - If you're not first, you're last!

Mike Brady: A gift is only a good thing when the giver has given thought to that gift. When the gift the giver gives gives grief, then that gift should give the givee regrets.

Peter Brady: Dad, I think I hit him in the head with these. I'm sorry, Mr. Phillips.
Mike Brady: Peter, drumsticks are not toys.
Peter Brady: Oh, they're not drumsticks, Dad. They're weapons.
Mike Brady: Well, weapons are not toys either, Peter.

Mike Brady: Roy, I have something I'd like to discuss with you.
Roy: Is it about where I shop?
Mike Brady: No, but now that you mention it, I have that same suit in brown and green.
Roy: I know. You're wearing it.
Mike Brady: Ah. So I am.

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