Will Ferrell

Quotes from Will Ferrell movies and TV shows - page 4 of 9

Nick Halsey: You need to put up some curtains.
Samantha: Why? So I don't have some drunk staring at me all day?
Nick Halsey: No so you don't have to look at your future.

Kenny Loftus: Your momma is so fat, you have to roll her in flour, then dive for the wet spot.
Nick Halsey: Do you know what that means?
Kenny Loftus: No.
Nick Halsey: Yeah, maybe don't tell that one.

Nick Halsey: I don't think it's right to make a decision like that without having authentic Mexican food. Have you had an authentic Mexican meal in Arizona?

Nick Halsey: You know they say that the dining room is the least utilized room in the house? I think it's the front lawn. It's staring to look good, don't you think?

Frank Garcia: Do you know the success rate for marriage when one person gets sobers, and the other one doesn't?
Nick Halsey: Is it higher than the suicide rate for cops?

More Everything Must Go quotes

Darnell Lewis: We do this, we do this hard!
James King: I can get hard.

Darnell Lewis: When life throws you Dick you make Dick-ade!
James King: Dick-ade doesn't sound like a significant improvement over dick.

More Get Hard quotes

Dr. Grace Hart: Shall we begin the autopsy? Dr. Grace Hart.
Watson: A woman doctor?
Holmes: Impossible. Fortunately we have a real doctor here.
Watson: Would you like some heroin?

More Holmes & Watson quotes

Scott Johansen: Eat her fucking face off, Martha. (00:31:57)

Frank: Are you guys familiar with the cliché, 'It's a cliché because it's true'? Well, that cliché about clichés being true has never more true than right now with the cliché, 'The house always wins.'
Scott Johansen: What?

More The House quotes

Phil Weston: I am angry. I'm like a large tornado of anger, swirling about.

Phil Weston: OK, you caught me. The finches were a bad idea. And I wasn't gonna say anything, but I think some of them may have salmonella. A fair amount, in fact. I may have inadvertently poisoned your children.

Phil Weston: I was born a baby, a blank slate. I thought I was in control of my own destiny, and then I met my dad.

Ann Hogan: You ease up on him.
Phil Weston: You just ease up there on your corduroy jacket.

Phil Weston: Are you a robot-woman? Are you a robot?
Barbara Weston: I am not a robot.

Phil Weston: Pizza at my house.

Phil Weston: They're like 4-foot whirling dervishes. I don't even know what a whirling dervish is but that's what they're like.

Neighbor: Shut UP OUT there.
Phil Weston: You shut UP in there.

Buck Weston: You know how hard it's been for me ever since your mom died.
Phil Weston: She didn't die! She divorced you.
Buck Weston: Ehh... tomatoes, tomahtoes.

Phil Weston: This is Gian Piero and Massimo. They're apprentice butchers.
Mark Avery: Could the blacksmiths and candlestick makers not make it?
Mike Ditka: Shut up.

More Kicking and Screaming quotes

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