Jon Sandys

22nd Mar 2024

Road House (2024)

[On board a small boat.]
Knox: Lookie here, our own little octagon.
Dalton: What? Who taught you shapes?

Jon Sandys

8th Jan 2024

Archer (2009)

7th Jan 2024

Archer (2009)

26th Oct 2023

Vexed (2010)

Episode #1.3 - S1-E3

Kate: You wouldn't have a problem if this was your daughter?
Jack: She's not my daughter!
Kate: She's someone's daughter.
Jack: Every woman I've ever had sex with was someone's daughter, it's never stopped me from playing daddy.
Kate: Urgh.
Jack: I think that might have come out wrong.
Kate: OK, if your daughter was a stripper.
Jack: Why is my daughter a stripper?!
Kate: Ah, so you would mind!
Jack: What if your son...was a rapist?
Kate: How is that relevant?!
Jack: You started it.
Kate: I want you to acknowledge how you'd feel if your daughter made her living by having men leering at her.
Jack: OK, how would you feel if your rapist son attacked my stripper daughter, threw acid in her face, she's disfigured for life, can't even work!
Kate: I wouldn't defend him.
Jack: Your own son?! Some mother you'd be.

Jon Sandys

28th Sep 2023

Firefly (2002)

Shindig - S1-E6

Mal: [Standing over defeated opponent] Mercy is the mark of a great man. [Stabs him]. I guess I'm just a good man. [Stabs him again] Well...I'm all right.

Jon Sandys

28th Sep 2023

Firefly (2002)

28th Sep 2023

Firefly (2002)

War Stories - S1-E9

Mal: I know it's a difficult mission, but you and I...have to get it on.
Zoe: I understand. We have no choice. Take me sir, take me hard.
Jayne: Now something about that is just downright unsettling.
[Mal and Zoe awkwardly lean in towards a kiss].
Wash: [dragging Zoe away] We'll be in our bunk.

Jon Sandys

16th Aug 2023

Psych (2006)

7th Aug 2023

Psych (2006)

Santabarbaratown - S6-E16

Shawn: Rough day for you, man, no way around that. Girl you're dating turns out to be your sister...who killed your father. Who killed your mother, and was sleeping with your ex girlfriend.
Gus: And Shawn punched you in the face.
Shawn: Yeah, there's that, too.

Jon Sandys

Hero or Hate Crime? - S12-E6

Charlie: All right, fine. I voluntarily stepped in the dog shit so that I would smell of dog shit. Happy?
Dennis: Less happy!
Dee: Why would it make me happy?!
Charlie: I was trying to cover up the smell of the skunk that I let spray me so that there would be no questions.
Dennis: Well, now I have more questions!
Dee: Of course you do.

Jon Sandys

19th May 2023

Rick and Morty (2013)

Bad Beat - S5-E5

Jake: Captain, allow me to introduce you to major East Coast arms dealer Dan "Daniel" Valdano. That's right, his nickname is longer than his actual name. Why's that, Terry?
Terry: 'Cause he's a dick.

Jon Sandys

30th Jul 2022

The Gray Man (2022)

21st Jul 2022

Boston Legal (2004)

8th May 2021

Rick and Morty (2013)

Big Trouble in Little Sanchez - S2-E7

Rick: Will you fix your marriage or get a divorce already?!
Jerry: Well, we tried a couples therapist.
Rick: That's earth therapy. You might as well ask a horse to fix a merry-go-round. I mean he'll try his best, but mostly he's just gonna get horrified.

Jon Sandys

8th May 2021

Cougar Town (2009)

Bobby Cobb: I'm bad at sex. There's a lot of thrashing and thumping, but nothing really gets done. I'm like a broken dishwasher.

Jon Sandys

8th Apr 2021

Justified (2010)

Dark as a Dungeon - S6-E8

Mortician: Do you wish to exhume all the plots?
Raylan: Just the two, my parents.
Mortician: How about the manner in which they were buried?
Raylan: I wasn't around, but I guarantee he put her in the cheapest piece of shit available.
Mortician: And him?
Raylan: I put him in the cheapest piece of shit available.

Jon Sandys

12th Dec 2020

Sherlock (2010)

The Hounds of Baskerville - S2-E2

Sherlock: I never did ask, Dr. Frankland, what exactly is it that you do here?
Dr. Frankland: Ah, Mr. Holmes, I would LOVE to tell you, but then, of course, I'd have to kill you. [Chuckles].
Sherlock: That would be tremendously ambitious of you.

Jon Sandys

8th Aug 2020

Future Man (2017)

Haven Is for Real - S3-E5

[Watching a dreadful performance by James Dean.]
Josh: I gotta get some air.
Abraham Lincoln: I don't blame you. This is the worst theater experience I've ever had.

Jon Sandys

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