Hugh: I find that as difficult to swallow as this potage au gelee.
Judy: How would you like to swallow one sandwich d'knuckles?
Divine: Connie Marble, you stand convicted of assholeism! Your proper punishment will now take place. Look pretty for the picture, Connie.
Stuart Farquhar: Afternoon, Miss Dobbs, a lovely day for it.
Miss Dobbs: That's what they all say, Mr Farquhar, but it won't get you anywhere.
Stuart Farquhar: I meant for the Elsbels trip, Miss Dobbs.
The Queen: Didst I feel aright or didst I feel that thy two hands did upon my royal body cop a feel?
Allan: I wonder if she actually had an orgasm in the two years we were married, or did she fake it that night?
Rev. Mr. LaSalle: I shall pray for you, Bean. This land abounds in ruffians and varmints. Their numbers are legion, their evil skills commensurate.
Judge Roy Bean: Piss on 'em.
Lila Kolodny: Are you glad we waited?
Lenny Cantrow: I'm glad we waited.
Lila Kolodny: Well, we have the rest of our lives, 40, 50, 60, 100 years.
Tang Lung: Movement number 4: Dragon seeks path. Hi-yah!" (Tang kicks, knocking a hoodlum unconscious) "Dragon whips his tail.
Dr. Prodd: Name, please?
Miss Smethurst: Smethurst.
Dr. Prodd: Oh yes, I have some good news for you, Mrs Smethurst.
Miss Smethurst: Miss Smethurst.
Dr. Prodd: Oh, in that case I have some bad news for you.
Jaime: This thing you call politics? Politics is bullshit.
Lucas: I was wondering what it was.
Colonel: I didn't know that chivalry still existed in your semi-savage country.
Rafael Acosta: Sir, you just insulted the Republic of Miranda.
Colonel: I don't give a damn about the Republic of Miranda.
Rafael Acosta: And I shit on your entire army.
Charlie Brown: Hmm, a letter to Snoopy. What a surprise. I never get any mail. I had 15 pen pals once, and they let me do all the writing.
Tang Lung: Let him know. If I ever see him here again... he won't leave alive.