Kikuchiyo: This baby... It's me... It's what happened to me.
Lt. Harry Brubaker: I'm a lawyer from Denver, Colorado.
Mike Forney: Judas, how'd you wind up in a smelly ditch in Korea?
Lt. Harry Brubaker: I was just asking myself that same question.
Lt. Commander Philip Francis Queeg: Aboard my ship, excellent performance is standard, standard performance is sub-standard, and sub-standard performance is not permitted to exist - that, I warn you.