George Tully: They tried to kill us.
Steel: Not quite, they encouraged us to die.
Ethan Burke: C'mon this isn't an ordinary town. You know that.
Nurse Pam: You are very right about that. This is no ordinary town. This is an extraordinary town.
Simon Holmes: Sometimes I wish we collected stamps for fun, instead of battling the forces of weirdness.
Terry McGinnis: 'Terry, today was beach day, remember? Where were you?' Oh, nowhere, Mom, just out saving the world.
FBI Agent Max Canary: If I'm not mistaken, she just cut off your balls, Derek.
Derek Jennings: Just the one, Max. Just the one.
Urko: These humans are dangerous, don't you understand that? They think that they're as good as we are.
Shane Vendrell: So, we cause a triple murder before breakfast, start a race war before dinner - that's uh, that's a pretty good day.
Aku: Long ago in a distant land, I, Aku, the shape shifting master of darkness, unleashed an unspeakable evil. But a foolish samurai warrior wielding a magic sword stepped forth to oppose me. Before the final blow was struck, I tore open a portal in time, and flung him into the future where my evil is law. Now the fool seeks to return to the past and undo the future that is Aku.