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John Cleese (back to the J list / C list)

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Title Mistakes Trivia Pictures Corrections Quotes Easter eggs Trailer
Charlie's Angels: Full Throttle 67 10 18 44 1
The Day the Earth Stood Still 12 1 1 8 6 Yes
Die Another Day 94 40 45 93 8 1
Fawlty Towers 73 12 4 17 8
Fierce Creatures 13 2
A Fish Called Wanda 55 4 2 2
The Jungle Book (1994) 3 1
Mary Shelley's Frankenstein 5 1
The Meaning of Life 32 4 6
Monty Python and the Holy Grail 27 9 1 23 8 1
Monty Python's Flying Circus 26 9 4 24 5
Monty Python's Life of Brian 18 13 9 5
Rat Race 150 8 8 22 2
Shrek 2 21 22 9 83 6 2
Shrek Forever After 9 4 Yes
Time Bandits 13 6
The World is Not Enough 102 12 3 37

Below are a few quotes involving John Cleese - click the title to view the complete list. If you think their finest moments are missing from the full list, just click "submit something" to submit something new.

Fawlty Towers quotes

Mrs Richards: And another thing. I expect to be able to see the sea.

Basil: [whispering to Manuel] Deaf, Mad and Blind. [To Mrs Richards] Yes, this is the view as far as I can remember... yes, yes it is.

Mrs Richards: When I pay for a view, I expect something more interesting than that.

Basil: But that is Torquay, madam.

Mrs Richards: Well it's not good enough.

Basil: Well may I ask what you expected to see out of a Torquay hotel bedroom window? Sydney Opera House perhaps? The Hanging Gardens of Babylon? Herds of wildebeest sweeping majestically across the plain...

Mrs Richards: [interrupting] Don't be silly. I expect to be able to see the sea.

Basil: You CAN see the sea! It's over there between the land and the sky!

Mrs Richards: I'd need a telescope to see that.

Basil: Well might I suggest you move to a hotel closer to the sea. Or preferably in it.

Mrs Richards: Now listen to me. I'm not satisified but I've decided to stay. HOWEVER, I shall expect a deduction.

Basil: Why, because Krakatoa isn't erupting at the moment?

Mrs Richards: Because the room is cold, the bath is too small, the view is invisible and the radio doesn't work.

Basil: No, the radio works. You don't.

Basil: Is something wrong?

German guest: Will you please stop talking about the war?

Basil: Me? You started it.

German guest: We did not.

Basil: Yes you did, you invaded Poland.

Basil: Don't mention the war. I mentioned it once, but I think I got away with it all right.

Basil: Did you ever see that film, "How To Murder Your Wife"?

Major Gowen: How To Murder Your Wife"?

Basil: Yes, awfully good. I saw it six times.

Basil: Hello? - Ah, yes, Mr O'Reilly, well it's perfectly simple. When I asked you to build me a wall I was rather hoping that instead of just dumping the bricks in a pile you might have found time to cement them together...you know, one on top of another, in the traditional fashion.

Monty Python and the Holy Grail quotes

French Soldier: Ah don' wanna talk to you no more, you empty-headed animal food-trough wiper! I fart in your general direction! Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries!

Sir Galahad: Well, is there someone else up there we could talk to?

French Soldier: No! Now go away or I shall taunt you a second time!