Bishop73

30th May 2023

Seinfeld (1990)

Trivia: Both Larry David and Michael Richards got their start on the sketch show "Fridays." David was both a writer and performer, where Richards was mainly just a performer. Incidentally, some of the writers Larry David worked with were Tom Kramer, Elaine Pope, and Matt Neuman.

Bishop73

23rd May 2023

Seinfeld (1990)

Elaine: Recently I've been thinking about this friend of mine.
Carl: What friend?
Elaine: Oh, just this woman. She got impregnated by her troglodytic half-brother and decided to have an abortion.
Carl: You know, someday we're gonna get enough people in the Supreme Court to change that law.

Bishop73

22nd May 2023

Seinfeld (1990)

The Suicide - S3-E15

Jerry Seinfeld: The thing I don't understand about the suicide person, is the people that try and commit suicide for some reason, they don't die, and then that's it. They stop trying. Why? Why don't they just keep trying? What has changed? Is their life any better now? No. In fact, it's worse, 'cause now they've found out, here's one more thing you stink at. That's why these people don't succeed in life to begin with. Because they give up too easy. I say if pills don't work, try a rope. Car won't start in the garage? Get a tune-up. You know what I mean? There's nothing more rewarding than reaching a goal you've set for yourself.

Bishop73

22nd May 2023

Seinfeld (1990)

The Subway - S3-E13

Kramer: All right, Coney Island? OK, you can take the B or the F and switch for the N at Broadway and Lafayette. Or you can go over the bridge to DeKalb and catch the Q to Atlantic Avenue then switch to the IRT, 2, 3, 4, or 5. But don't get on the G. See, that's very tempting, but you wind up on Smith and 9th street, then you gotta get on the R.
Elaine: Couldn't he just take the D straight to Coney Island?
Kramer: Well yeah.

Bishop73

22nd May 2023

Seinfeld (1990)

The Alternate Side - S3-E11

Rental Car Agent: I'm sorry, we have no mid-size available at the moment.
Jerry Seinfeld: I don't understand. I made a reservation. Do you have my reservation?
Agent: Yes we do. Unfortunately, we ran out of cars.
Jerry: But the reservation keeps the car here. That's why you have the reservation.
Agent: I know why we have reservations.
Jerry: I don't think you do. If you did, I'd have a car.

Bishop73

22nd May 2023

Seinfeld (1990)

The Stranded - S3-E10

Gwen: I wondered what happened to my fiancé. I know he's here somewhere. Ellen, have you seen my fiancé?
Ellen: He's upstairs.
Gwen: Are you going upstairs? Tell my fiancé I'm looking for him. I have lost my fiancé, the poor baby.
Elaine: [In an Australian accent] Maybe the dingo ate your baby.
Gwen: What?
Elaine: [Australian accent] The dingo ate your baby.

Bishop73

22nd May 2023

Seinfeld (1990)

The Pilot (2) - S4-E24

Stu Chermack: What do you think the real problem is?
Rita Kirson: It's Seinfeld. He can't act. It's pathetic. I told you, these stand-ups can't act. I'm cringing watching him.

Bishop73

22nd May 2023

Seinfeld (1990)

The Pilot (1) - S4-E23

George Costanza: What if the pilot gets picked up and becomes a series?
Dana Foley: That would be wonderful, George. You'll be rich and successful.
George: That's exactly what I'm worried about. God would never let me be successful. He'd kill me first. He'll never let me be happy.
Dana: I thought you didn't believe in God.
George: I do for the bad things.
Dana: Do you hear what you're saying? God isn't out to get you, George. What What is that on your lip?
George: What?
Dana: It's like a discoloration. It's white.
George: [Looking at his reflection] Yes. Yes, it's white. Why is that white?
Dana: You better get that checked out.
George: "Better get that checked out"?
Dana: I would.
George: What kind of a therapist are you? I'm telling you I'm scared that something terrible is going to happen to me, right away you start looking for tumors?

Bishop73

22nd May 2023

Seinfeld (1990)

The Virgin - S4-E10

Elaine: Look at George. He lucked out, huh?
Jerry: Oh, you're not kidding. Who'd have figured Susan would break up with him? They had a good thing going.
Elaine: Yeah. Since she met him, she's been vomited on, her family's cabin's been burned down, she learned her father's a homosexual, and she got fired from a high-paying network job. Yeah, they had a real good thing going.

Bishop73

22nd May 2023

Seinfeld (1990)

The Glasses - S5-E3

Doctor: OK.
Elaine: Okay? That's it? I don't need a shot?
Doctor: Not shot. Dog bite.
Elaine: No, no, no. I know I wasn't shot. Do I need a shot.
Doctor: Not shot. Dog bite. Woof-woof, not bang-bang.

Bishop73

22nd May 2023

Seinfeld (1990)

The Switch - S6-E11

Jerry Seinfeld: Don't you know what it means to become an orgy guy? It changes everything. I have to dress different. I have to act different. I'd have to grow a mustache and get all kinds of robes and lotions and...I'd need a new bedspread, new curtains. I'd have to get thick carpeting and weirdo lighting. Of course, I'd have to get new friends. I'd have to get orgy friends. No. I'm not ready for it.

Bishop73

22nd May 2023

Seinfeld (1990)

22nd May 2023

Seinfeld (1990)

The Gymnast - S6-E6

Mr. Pitt: I have been accused of wrongdoing, but these false accusations will not deter us. We will annex Poland by the spring at any cost! And, our stocks will rise high!

Bishop73

22nd May 2023

Seinfeld (1990)

The Sponge - S7-E9

Pharmacist: Can I help you?
Elaine: Yeah, do you have any Today Sponges? I know they're off the market, but I was...
Pharmacist: Actually we have a case left.
Elaine: A case? A case of Sponges? I, I mean a case. Hah. Uh... H-how...? How many come in a case?
Pharmacist: 60.
Elaine: 60? Um... Well, I'll take 3.
Pharmacist: 3.
Elaine: Well, make it 10.
Pharmacist: 10?
Elaine: 20 Sponges should be plenty.
Pharmacist: Did you say 20?
Elaine: Yeah. 25 Sponges is just fine.
Pharmacist: 25?
Elaine: Yeah.
Pharmacist: You're set with 25?
Elaine: Yeah, yeah. Just give me the whole case, I'll be on my way.

Bishop73

22nd May 2023

Seinfeld (1990)

The Secret Code - S7-E7

Jerry Seinfeld: Oh, my God. Look at this. It's the new J. Peterman catalog. Look.
George Costanza: "The Rogue's Wallet. It's where he kept his card, his dirty little secret. Short, devious, balding... His name was Costanza. He killed my mother."

Bishop73

22nd May 2023

Seinfeld (1990)

The Yada Yada - S8-E19

Father Curtis: Tell me your sins, my son.
Jerry: Uh, well I should mention that I'm Jewish.
Father Curtis: Oh, that's no sin.
Jerry: Oh, good. Anyway, I wanted to talk to you about Dr. Whatley. I, I have a suspicion he that he converted to Judaism for the jokes.
Father Curtis: And this offends you as a Jewish person?
Jerry: No, it offends me as a comedian. And it'll interest you to know, that he's also telling Catholic jokes. And they're old jokes. I mean, the Pope and Raquel Welch in a lifeboat.
Father Curtis: I haven't heard that one.
Jerry; Oh, I'm sure you have. They're out on the ocean and yada, yada, yada and she, and she says "those aren't buoys."
Father Curtis: [Laughing].
Jerry: [Father Curtis still laughing] Father.
Father Curtis: One second. [Continues laughing].

Bishop73

22nd May 2023

Seinfeld (1990)

The Little Kicks - S8-E4

George Costanza: Anna told me that Elaine said I was one of the worst seeds she'd ever seen.
Jerry Seinfeld: Interesting. She doesn't care for you. Then a stern warning. Suddenly a phone call. Seems Elaine's made you the bad boy. And Anna digs the bad boy.
George: I'm the bad boy. I've never been the bad boy.
Jerry: You've been the bad employee, the bad son, the bad friend.
George: Yes. Yes. Yes.
Jerry: The bad fiancé, bad dinner guest, bad credit risk.
George: OK, the point is made.
Jerry: The bad date, the bad sport, the bad citizen. The bad tipper.

Bishop73

10th May 2023

Seinfeld (1990)

The Cheever Letters - S4-E8

Trivia: In this episode, Susan finds letters from John Cheever (a real life writer) to her father exposing their relationship. Incidentally, in real life, John Cheever also had a daughter named Susan.

Bishop73

10th May 2023

Seinfeld (1990)

The Soup - S6-E7

Trivia: In this episode, George flirts with and asks out the waitress, Kelly. Kelly is played by Tracy Kolis. Kolis previously played Marlene in s02e01, "The Ex-Girlfriend", whom George was dating before breaking up with her. In the episode, Marlene is a cashier.

Bishop73

3rd May 2023

Seinfeld (1990)

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