Dumb and Dumber (1994)

Lloyd: What do you mean you don't bet? Wussy! Wussy!
Harry: I never have and I never will.
Lloyd: Yeah, right. I bet you twenty bucks I can get you gambling before the end of the day.
Harry: No way.
Lloyd: I give you three to one odds.
Harry: No.
Lloyd: Five to one?
Harry: No.
Lloyd Ten to one?
Harry: You're on.
[Lloyd and Harry both shake hands and smile.]
Lloyd: I'm gonna get you.
Harry: Nuh-uh.
Lloyd: I don't know how, but I'm gonna get you.
Harry: Nuh-uh.

Lloyd: This didn't come out of our travel fund.
Harry: Oh.
Lloyd: Yeah, I was able to raise 25 extra bucks before we left.
Harry: Where did you get 25 extra bucks?
Lloyd: I sold some stuff, to Billy on 4C.
Harry: The blind kid?
Lloyd: [Laughing.] Yeah, yeah.
Harry: What did you sell him Lloyd?
Lloyd: You know, stuff.
Harry: What kinda stuff?
Lloyd: Few baseball cards, a sack of marbles, [coughs.] Petey.
Harry: Petey? You sold my dead bird to a blind kid? Lloyd, wh- he- wha- Petey didn't even have a head!
Lloyd: Harry, I took care of it.

Harry: I expected the Rocky Mountains to be a little rockier than this.
Lloyd: I was thinking the same thing. That John Denver's full of shit, man.

Harry: Yeah I called her up, she gave me a bunch of crap about me not listening to her, or something, I don't know, I wasn't really paying attention.

Harry: Where's the booze?
Lloyd: I got robbed by a sweet old lady on a motorized cart. I didn't even see it coming.

Lloyd: So what happened, Harry? Some little filly break your heart?
Harry: No, it was a girl.
Lloyd: Oh!

Harry: Why would she have you meet her in a bar at 10 in the morning?
Lloyd: I just figured she was a raging alcoholic!

Harry: Skis, huh?
Beth: That's right.
Harry: Great. They yours?
Beth: Uh-huh.
Harry: Both of them?
Beth: Yeah.
Harry: Ah, cool!

Lloyd Christmas: What do you think the chances are of a guy like you and a girl like me ending up together?
Mary Swanson: Well Lloyd, that's difficult to say. We really don't.
Lloyd Christmas: Hit me with it! Just give it to me straight! I came a long way just to see you, Mary. Just...the least you can do is level with me. What are my chances?
Mary Swanson: Not good.
Lloyd Christmas: You mean not good like, one out of a hundred?
Mary Christmas: I'd say more like one out of a million.
Lloyd Christmas: So you're telling me there's a chance! YEAH!